Sunday, May 14, 2006

Shoe Therapy

Yesterday, I did go with my husband on his rockhounding trip outside of Grand Junction. He didn't find much, but I know he loves to get out there and dig for mineral specimens. I stayed at the the truck and read, wrote, and napped. Then we ran some errands in Grand Junction. I got three new pairs of Crocs - ocean blue, sage green, and bright purple. This "retail shoe therapy" always helps me to get over bad news from the oncologist. Took three pair this time. I almost got red, too, but I have other red shoes so I'm not in such a hurry for red or any neutral color of Crocs.

By the way, Happy Mother's Day to anyone out there who is a mother, stepmother, or like a mother to somebody.

We tried to eat as healthy as possible yesterday, although I did drink part of a beer out in the field - a few other friends were there and for some reason, beer just sounded good. After a salad at Chili's, we went to the Beyond Juice place and split a fruit smoothie for dessert.

I have found three possibilities for new clinical trials. All involve chemo with something else - heat, radiation, or another drug. I'll have a lot more questions before I try another clinical trial. I don't think I can start any of them until I'm off the sorafenib for one month which would be roughly June 12th. I don't know what to think of chemo - it seems to have such a low rate of success with cholangiocarcinoma, yet several people on the cholangiocarcinoma.org website have had good results. If I'm not going to live that much longer, I don't know if I want to spend what time I have left dealing with the side effects of chemo. I'll know more Tuesday when I see the oncologist. I don't know how many tumors I can get in my liver and how long I can live with the little bastards, but if sheer will to live works, then I will be here a long time. Everyone says I volunteer too much or should say no more often. Well, I'm not volunteering to go to heaven so soon - I'm saying no. God can get someone else to be the greeter up in heaven.

Just up here in Colorado wearing new Crocs and hitting the "Override" button.

1 comment:

Betty Johnson said...

Well those liver tumors may have doubled in size but you look great.
Enjoy your shoes and hang in there.