Hi Everyone!
We just got home from the spring Denver Gem & Mineral Show. I have been on three trips lately and hardly been home. My family has wanted me to rest, so they've kept me away from the computer and phone. So I'm sorry I've been out of touch.
MEDICAL UPDATE
I couldn't have FOLFOX last week because my white blood cell/platelet count was too low; however, I'd been on vacation with my sisters to Texas and wasn't about to take the shots on the road. I was able to have my Avastin infusion last Wednesday.
This week, I have been on the shots to improve my white blood cell/platelet count, so hopefully, on Wednesday, I can do FOLFOX. I go in at 9:45am, they take blood, and we'll see what happens. I need to check in with them about other stuff as well.
I'm down to two steroids per day. While my feet and legs are still swelling and bruising, probably from the chemo Avastin or FOLFOX, my left leg is doing much better. I think I'm getting my muscle back. Every day it improves. I'm still using my cane (thanks Mr. Park for the four-pronger), but I'm able to move my leg more easily and with less pain. I'm starting to bend my knee a tad. I'm really excited about that. This is the issue related to radiation recall which was induced by the chemo Gemzar which I'm not on any more.
I have completely lost my hair. But it's growing back in pretty fast and I think I look good bald!
Thanks everyone for your indulgence while I have been on all these heavy medications. Some days, I don't know how long I can go on like this taking all this medication, but if I can get off the steroids, if the FOLFOX will stall the tumor growth, if I can have radioactive seeds, maybe, just maybe, there's hope for me. Sometimes, I feel like I should just die and get out of the way, not drag everyone through this. But I'm not there yet. I think there's a chance. I think there's more time for me. If there's a duty to die, I'm not ready to do my duty. Besides, the daffodils are blooming in my yard, the grass is turning green. I've just reconnected to so many good friends from the past. No, I'm not dying anytime soon.
In the mean time, I do feel myself coming off the steroid taper and calming down. I'm hoping we'll drop the dosage this week.
I do want to post more about the three trips and some photos, but again, I find myself up too late, and I need to go to bed.
While in Denver this weekend, I got to see my Denver girlfriends: Jody Curphy, Susan Asher, Darlene Ritchie, Diane King, and Marcia Karshmer. Thanks to all of you for coming down to see me at the show or meeting us for dinner. We also spent time with Robert's son Ian. We were pleased with our sales, and Robert and I both did some buying for our businesses, but we were so busy, it was hard to get out of our room. I got to see many old friends from the Denver gem & mineral community, including Sandy & Chauncey Walden who introduced me to Robert twelve years ago, and for which I am eternally grateful.
Again, thank you everyone for prayers, gifts, books, recommendations, and support. Thank you for rooting for me. You can't imagine how it helps!
Just up here in Colorado looking forward to warmer weather and staying put for a while.
Sincerely, Caroline
We saw a fox on the side of the road near Ridgway coming home tonight. Of course, there were elk and deer and lots of baby calves in the valley.
Monday, April 30, 2007
Thursday, April 26, 2007
REAL GOOD NEWS!
REAL GOOD NEWS!
This is Caroline' s oldest sister, Suzie. Caroline and Robert are on their way to Denver for a gem and mineral show and she asked me to post the good news.
Caroline was unable to have FOLFOX chemo yesterday due to low blood count but she was able to have an Avastin infusion. The blood work prior to chemo yesterday showed her CA19-9 tumor marker to be 5,545 --- which is down from the 14,000 range. YEA!!!!
Caroline wants to thank all of you for your love and support. I want to thank you too.
After spending 11 days with her on our Gray Girls' Texas Trek, I can tell you she is one determined woman. It is beyond me how she manages to do all she does. When she undressed the first night of our trip, I was shocked to see her leg. The leg from the knee down, the ankle, foot, and toes were all incredibly swollen and there were a number of big bruises on that leg as well as other parts of her body. I was afraid the skin on her ankle was gong to split open. Ice packs and wrapping her leg definitely helped but she said it's beginning to swell again after yesterday's Avastin infusion.
Caroline will blog again as soon as she can ---- heaven knows she'll have a lot to report!
Please continue the prayers and good thoughts for my amazing sister,
Suzie Gray West
Tuesday, April 24, 2007
Back Home - More Later
Hi Everyone!
I just got home from the most incredible trip to Texas to "touch my roots". We saw lots of old friends, family, found our "dead people" at the Cleburne Cemetary and Laureland in Dallas.
I can't thank my sisters enough for their indulgence, patience, and laughter. All three of us had "meltdowns" where we had to bitch at each other, but hey, at this point, we are close enough to do that.
I see Dr. B tomorrow - first we haveto see where my bloodwork is at. Pray for healthy red & white blood cell counts and PLATELETS! I hope I can have my FOLFOX tomorrrow!
I will post more later about the trip with pictures.
My hair is growing back in pretty fast, so I don't think I'll completely shave my head. Thanks to AC & Jean in Texas and Margaret & the Park family for all the hats. Margaret, her daughter Taylor (my new adopted daughter), and my sisters were in a Cancer Walk in Duncanville last Saturday. (We spent 1962-1969 in Duncanville and had a great experience growing up there. ) I had to ride in a wheelchair, and my dear friend from childhood, Margaret, pushed me most of the way. It was so good to reconnect with some old friends, especially Margaret and her family.
Okay, I gotta go take some pills.
My condolences to the McCrea Family. I cannot tell you how much I will miss Valerie. She was a great inspiration to me. Also, our sympathies to the Ken McKenzie (his wife passed away this week and she as well was a real fighter and inspiration to me), Warren Doyle's family, and Mary's family from Ewe & Me in Ridgway. (Sorry I can't think of Mary's last name.)
Congratulations to new parents and grandparents: Trevor & Erin from our local bakery - a boy, their first, Catcher Easton Latta; the Swim Shop people in Ouray (Jennings, fun people to bowl against),; and Julia Gregory of Austin with her new grandbaby whose name I cannot find at the minute.
Thanks everyone for your prayers, good wishes, etc. You have been a big help!
Just up here in Colorado, glad to be home, but we should be leaving town on Thursday for the spring Gem & Mineral Show in Denver if all goes well, and I can find someone to clean my port in Denver.
Sincerely, Caroline
I just got home from the most incredible trip to Texas to "touch my roots". We saw lots of old friends, family, found our "dead people" at the Cleburne Cemetary and Laureland in Dallas.
I can't thank my sisters enough for their indulgence, patience, and laughter. All three of us had "meltdowns" where we had to bitch at each other, but hey, at this point, we are close enough to do that.
I see Dr. B tomorrow - first we haveto see where my bloodwork is at. Pray for healthy red & white blood cell counts and PLATELETS! I hope I can have my FOLFOX tomorrrow!
I will post more later about the trip with pictures.
My hair is growing back in pretty fast, so I don't think I'll completely shave my head. Thanks to AC & Jean in Texas and Margaret & the Park family for all the hats. Margaret, her daughter Taylor (my new adopted daughter), and my sisters were in a Cancer Walk in Duncanville last Saturday. (We spent 1962-1969 in Duncanville and had a great experience growing up there. ) I had to ride in a wheelchair, and my dear friend from childhood, Margaret, pushed me most of the way. It was so good to reconnect with some old friends, especially Margaret and her family.
Okay, I gotta go take some pills.
My condolences to the McCrea Family. I cannot tell you how much I will miss Valerie. She was a great inspiration to me. Also, our sympathies to the Ken McKenzie (his wife passed away this week and she as well was a real fighter and inspiration to me), Warren Doyle's family, and Mary's family from Ewe & Me in Ridgway. (Sorry I can't think of Mary's last name.)
Congratulations to new parents and grandparents: Trevor & Erin from our local bakery - a boy, their first, Catcher Easton Latta; the Swim Shop people in Ouray (Jennings, fun people to bowl against),; and Julia Gregory of Austin with her new grandbaby whose name I cannot find at the minute.
Thanks everyone for your prayers, good wishes, etc. You have been a big help!
Just up here in Colorado, glad to be home, but we should be leaving town on Thursday for the spring Gem & Mineral Show in Denver if all goes well, and I can find someone to clean my port in Denver.
Sincerely, Caroline
Thursday, April 05, 2007
CHEMO RESCHEDULED DUE TO WHITE BLOOD CELL COUNT
Note: This first post will be for medical update purposes. The next post will give you the juicy details of our trip to the South.
CHEMO POSTPONED UNTIL TOMORROW
I was not able to have chemo due to high white blood cell count. We're going to try again tomorrow. We did have a productive session in getting medications straightened out - what's for pain, nausea, sleep, and other side effects and the timing of when during the day to take them. Some meds address more that one side effect. My sisters were there to get informed as well, so Robert and I don't have to remember everything. It's always nourishing to my soul to be with my two sisters.
As I taper off the steroids for the pain in my left leg due to radiation myositis is coming back. I increased my dosage for the pain right after the doctors's appointment yesterday and fell asleep eating Ravioli di Portabello at the Olive Garden. (I did get about five bread sticks in before I got too sleepy.) I took a nice nap in the car and later at home. I took more pain med at bedtime and slept until about 4:00 am. I did not need a sleeping pill.
The steroids and lack of sleep really sent me into a manic state. I did not want to go to bed because I had lots of energy and creative rushes. But I also got combative as well. For those of you that have had to experience my argumentative side, I apologize. (I was in a carpool in 9th grade, and this one boy's mother would tell him, "Robert, you're so argumentive." And he would reply, "Mother, the word is argumentative and I am not." To this day, I have to look the word up to remember which spelling it really is.) I specifically apologize to Barbara Peterson and James Pettingill of the Elks for demanding a few last ads as the Elk's cookbook went to press last week to be ready in time for Fourth of July. So we will have a new, local cookbook this summer! I missed the deadline to get my recipe in, but I'm sure there will be some great ones.
We stayed with George & Glenda Moore last weekend in Marble Falls, and they were wonderful to us. George has given me lots of information and inspiriation as I go into this new FOLFOX chemo regime which he was on. We also hooked up with an old high school friend of mine, Julia Gregory, who is a naturalist for the State of Texas. We visited the Bamberger Ranch where Julia often volunteers. It is a ranch that started out very run down, and through many simple conservation techniques has been turned into a very productive operation on many levels. We were all excited about and impressed by what the Bamberger Family has done. You can get more info at their website - bambergerranch.org. I do owe an apology to the Moores as I was on the grumpy side on Sunday night. Thanks George & Glenda for putting up with me! And by the way, my friend Julia's mother (Shirley) is dating Doris Sutton's brother, and the couple may be coming for a visit this summer. I hope to get back to Austin later this month for another geololgy outing with George and Glenda.
We did managae to catch Jill Patterson for lunch in Lubbock on our drive home. I called her up and said, "Jill! I need to do a major face plant in a plate of Tex-Mex." And she so understood. So we met at El Chico. Her maternal grandmother recently passed away. My condoloscences to the Patterson Family. Jill will be working at Buckskin Booksellers this summer. I have stolen her from the Variety Store, but the Williams are still speaking to me.
MY HAIR IS FALLING OUT
Okay, it's finally happening. My hair is coming out in clumps. No, I don't really want to lose my hair, but then again, consider the possiblities. When they made the first Star Trek movie and they had that bald, gorgeous V-ger woman, I said "That's the planet I want to be from." I've always wanted to be a Vulcan. I already have the ears. Really. I wanted to wear them to bowling with my Quark Bar bowling shirt, but I never had the time to get them glued on. So if you see me around town with pointy ears. . .
TUMORS, LOTS OF TUMORS
After my last scan they counted about 12 tumors in my liver, four to six of which look troublesome including one on the left side which has had little or no tumors. Some of the tumors have "daughters". The biggest ones have not grown thtat much.
We are hoping the FOLFOX will halt or slow down the tumor growth. We also plan to look into some other procedures at Anschutz Center at CU.
In the mean time, I am enjoying life. Another spring for me. Seeing old friends, making amends, and planning for one crazy funeral to go out in style.
But I still say, tumors, hairballs, who cares. I really don't plan to leave until I'm ready. Not sure I get to choose, but I think God, the universe, or whatever you believe in is going to give me more time than the doctors think. Besides, I want to channel Verena Jacobson one more time for the Ouray County Historical Society's "Vignettes of History" to be staged this fall in Montrose.
Just up here in Colorado watching the sun go in and out of the clouds and having my sisters here. God bless us all.
Sincerely, Caroline
P.S. Thank you Diane King for sending the box of Smooth Move tea.
And thanks to Dorothy Davis from my cancer support group in GJ who came by to see me at the cancer center yesterday. Her family owned the Wiesbaden at one time.
CHEMO POSTPONED UNTIL TOMORROW
I was not able to have chemo due to high white blood cell count. We're going to try again tomorrow. We did have a productive session in getting medications straightened out - what's for pain, nausea, sleep, and other side effects and the timing of when during the day to take them. Some meds address more that one side effect. My sisters were there to get informed as well, so Robert and I don't have to remember everything. It's always nourishing to my soul to be with my two sisters.
As I taper off the steroids for the pain in my left leg due to radiation myositis is coming back. I increased my dosage for the pain right after the doctors's appointment yesterday and fell asleep eating Ravioli di Portabello at the Olive Garden. (I did get about five bread sticks in before I got too sleepy.) I took a nice nap in the car and later at home. I took more pain med at bedtime and slept until about 4:00 am. I did not need a sleeping pill.
The steroids and lack of sleep really sent me into a manic state. I did not want to go to bed because I had lots of energy and creative rushes. But I also got combative as well. For those of you that have had to experience my argumentative side, I apologize. (I was in a carpool in 9th grade, and this one boy's mother would tell him, "Robert, you're so argumentive." And he would reply, "Mother, the word is argumentative and I am not." To this day, I have to look the word up to remember which spelling it really is.) I specifically apologize to Barbara Peterson and James Pettingill of the Elks for demanding a few last ads as the Elk's cookbook went to press last week to be ready in time for Fourth of July. So we will have a new, local cookbook this summer! I missed the deadline to get my recipe in, but I'm sure there will be some great ones.
We stayed with George & Glenda Moore last weekend in Marble Falls, and they were wonderful to us. George has given me lots of information and inspiriation as I go into this new FOLFOX chemo regime which he was on. We also hooked up with an old high school friend of mine, Julia Gregory, who is a naturalist for the State of Texas. We visited the Bamberger Ranch where Julia often volunteers. It is a ranch that started out very run down, and through many simple conservation techniques has been turned into a very productive operation on many levels. We were all excited about and impressed by what the Bamberger Family has done. You can get more info at their website - bambergerranch.org. I do owe an apology to the Moores as I was on the grumpy side on Sunday night. Thanks George & Glenda for putting up with me! And by the way, my friend Julia's mother (Shirley) is dating Doris Sutton's brother, and the couple may be coming for a visit this summer. I hope to get back to Austin later this month for another geololgy outing with George and Glenda.
We did managae to catch Jill Patterson for lunch in Lubbock on our drive home. I called her up and said, "Jill! I need to do a major face plant in a plate of Tex-Mex." And she so understood. So we met at El Chico. Her maternal grandmother recently passed away. My condoloscences to the Patterson Family. Jill will be working at Buckskin Booksellers this summer. I have stolen her from the Variety Store, but the Williams are still speaking to me.
MY HAIR IS FALLING OUT
Okay, it's finally happening. My hair is coming out in clumps. No, I don't really want to lose my hair, but then again, consider the possiblities. When they made the first Star Trek movie and they had that bald, gorgeous V-ger woman, I said "That's the planet I want to be from." I've always wanted to be a Vulcan. I already have the ears. Really. I wanted to wear them to bowling with my Quark Bar bowling shirt, but I never had the time to get them glued on. So if you see me around town with pointy ears. . .
TUMORS, LOTS OF TUMORS
After my last scan they counted about 12 tumors in my liver, four to six of which look troublesome including one on the left side which has had little or no tumors. Some of the tumors have "daughters". The biggest ones have not grown thtat much.
We are hoping the FOLFOX will halt or slow down the tumor growth. We also plan to look into some other procedures at Anschutz Center at CU.
In the mean time, I am enjoying life. Another spring for me. Seeing old friends, making amends, and planning for one crazy funeral to go out in style.
But I still say, tumors, hairballs, who cares. I really don't plan to leave until I'm ready. Not sure I get to choose, but I think God, the universe, or whatever you believe in is going to give me more time than the doctors think. Besides, I want to channel Verena Jacobson one more time for the Ouray County Historical Society's "Vignettes of History" to be staged this fall in Montrose.
Just up here in Colorado watching the sun go in and out of the clouds and having my sisters here. God bless us all.
Sincerely, Caroline
P.S. Thank you Diane King for sending the box of Smooth Move tea.
And thanks to Dorothy Davis from my cancer support group in GJ who came by to see me at the cancer center yesterday. Her family owned the Wiesbaden at one time.
Wednesday, April 04, 2007
Home from Our Trip South
As it is late, I'm just going to say at this point that we had a really wonderful trip to Mississippi and Texas. We got home last night about 2am.
My sisters Suzie & Diane arrived from Prescott today. We will be seeing Dr. Bergen tomorrow to discuss various plans and to get my second chemo on the FOLFOX pump. I will have physical therapy on Friday and am checking in with my local doctor as well. A home health nurse will be in charge of flushing my port.
I'm tapering off the steroids which will make life easier for everyone. My leg is starting to hurt as I'm tapering off, so we are concerned about that. The leg pain is from the radiation recall, not cancer or any other treatment.
Just up here in Colorado, headed to bed.
Thanks again for prayers and so forth.
Sincerely, Caroline
My sisters Suzie & Diane arrived from Prescott today. We will be seeing Dr. Bergen tomorrow to discuss various plans and to get my second chemo on the FOLFOX pump. I will have physical therapy on Friday and am checking in with my local doctor as well. A home health nurse will be in charge of flushing my port.
I'm tapering off the steroids which will make life easier for everyone. My leg is starting to hurt as I'm tapering off, so we are concerned about that. The leg pain is from the radiation recall, not cancer or any other treatment.
Just up here in Colorado, headed to bed.
Thanks again for prayers and so forth.
Sincerely, Caroline
Monday, March 19, 2007
WE'RE GOING TO (CLAP) PUMP YOU UP!
MEDICAL UPDATE - NEW CHEMO COCKTAIL
Okay, I'm on the pump! (I call it Hanz-Franz.) It makes a little "zzzt" noise every now and then. It's comforting in some weird way. It's pumping 5FU into me which is the same as Xeloda that I took in pill form previously. I also had some minerals and folic acid and for the first time, Oxaliplatin. I was to have Avastin, too, but I just had it 9 days ago and couldn't have it again today. I hope Dr. B doesn't think I wanted FOLFOX just so I could have a bag to accessorize.
I saw Dr. Kane last Monday in Montrose, and she wanted me to go on this regime. It's worked really well on our friend George Moore who has colon cancer. (We will stop and see George & Glenda in Texas on our way home from our trip.) Dr. B says he's not so sure FOLFOX worked as well on cholangio, but I wanted to try it out and he's agreeable. The Gemzar is probably going to induce the radiation recall and pain. I do have some cramping in my feet. Any cholangio patients out there with stories of FOLFOX, good or bad? I'm all ears.
I have a CT-scan on Wednesday in GJ and will get the pump taken off then and flushed. This "pulling the plug" on the pump after 46 hours is critical in that it has to be flushed by the right people. In the future, I'll probably go to Mountain Medical in Ridgway for flushing. It'll be good to see those folks again.
I was on the ceiling today at Dr. B's office from the steroids. He and Amy his nurse had just gotten back from vacation. (Amy rode the big roller coaster for me at Disneyworld and screamed! I hope to get to Elitch Gardens in Denver this spring - Jody are you listening? Water World maybe when it gets warmer.) I was too busy being the village idiot to remember to call the insurance company last week and get pre-authorization for this new treatment, but we were able to handle it this morning. I had to be a pain in the ass to several people to get it done. Not the smoothest of mornings, but it'll be better next time. Robert missed City Council meeting. I wanted to go tonight as they were talking about going "Home Rule". As former City Treasurer, I would like to see this passed. I also wanted to encourage a party to sweep Main Street.
SOME REQUESTS FROM ME
This chemo will give me fatigue, nausea, and diarrhea. But I figure that's no reason to lie in bed and complain. You may see me out, but if I run in the bathroom all the sudden, you'll understand.
Also, if I am sleeping, I will try to remember to disconnect the phone. If I answer and I am groggy, just bear with me. If I need to go back to sleep I'll tell you. But sometimes it's good to have people to talk to. If anyone wants to come over and watch TV when I'm in those slow times, just holler. It might give Robert a break, and it'd be your day to watch me. I do have to more sensitive to infection now.
Two favors to ask everyone. Please do not send me jokes or unnecessary, sweet, little e-mails. My in-box is overflowing. Yes, they're nice, but I don't have time to read them or even figure out if I need to read them. I do love to get cards/post cards in the mail - P.O. Box 1884, Ouray, CO 81427. I think the art of letter writing has been lost.
Two, if you call, would you leave your number on the answering machine. You may save me a trip to walk in the other room. My legs really cramp up sometimes.
NO BLUE BELL!
I will also experience neuropathy (sp?) which is a side effect where you can't drink or have cold drinks, etc. I can't have ice cream for five days. At first I thought, Carol the infusion nurse (one of my favorites) said no ice cream ever again. I was especially bummed, as we are going south where they have "Blue Bell, the best ice cream in the country!" But it's just for five days. Little Creamery in Brenham, here I come.
Just up here in Colorado, not being a "girly-girl". I've got Hanz/Franz on my side.
Thanks you for your prayers. I pray fo us all.
Okay, I gotta to go take a pill.
Sincerly, Caroline
I may have cancer, but I'm having a good time!
Okay, I'm on the pump! (I call it Hanz-Franz.) It makes a little "zzzt" noise every now and then. It's comforting in some weird way. It's pumping 5FU into me which is the same as Xeloda that I took in pill form previously. I also had some minerals and folic acid and for the first time, Oxaliplatin. I was to have Avastin, too, but I just had it 9 days ago and couldn't have it again today. I hope Dr. B doesn't think I wanted FOLFOX just so I could have a bag to accessorize.
I saw Dr. Kane last Monday in Montrose, and she wanted me to go on this regime. It's worked really well on our friend George Moore who has colon cancer. (We will stop and see George & Glenda in Texas on our way home from our trip.) Dr. B says he's not so sure FOLFOX worked as well on cholangio, but I wanted to try it out and he's agreeable. The Gemzar is probably going to induce the radiation recall and pain. I do have some cramping in my feet. Any cholangio patients out there with stories of FOLFOX, good or bad? I'm all ears.
I have a CT-scan on Wednesday in GJ and will get the pump taken off then and flushed. This "pulling the plug" on the pump after 46 hours is critical in that it has to be flushed by the right people. In the future, I'll probably go to Mountain Medical in Ridgway for flushing. It'll be good to see those folks again.
I was on the ceiling today at Dr. B's office from the steroids. He and Amy his nurse had just gotten back from vacation. (Amy rode the big roller coaster for me at Disneyworld and screamed! I hope to get to Elitch Gardens in Denver this spring - Jody are you listening? Water World maybe when it gets warmer.) I was too busy being the village idiot to remember to call the insurance company last week and get pre-authorization for this new treatment, but we were able to handle it this morning. I had to be a pain in the ass to several people to get it done. Not the smoothest of mornings, but it'll be better next time. Robert missed City Council meeting. I wanted to go tonight as they were talking about going "Home Rule". As former City Treasurer, I would like to see this passed. I also wanted to encourage a party to sweep Main Street.
SOME REQUESTS FROM ME
This chemo will give me fatigue, nausea, and diarrhea. But I figure that's no reason to lie in bed and complain. You may see me out, but if I run in the bathroom all the sudden, you'll understand.
Also, if I am sleeping, I will try to remember to disconnect the phone. If I answer and I am groggy, just bear with me. If I need to go back to sleep I'll tell you. But sometimes it's good to have people to talk to. If anyone wants to come over and watch TV when I'm in those slow times, just holler. It might give Robert a break, and it'd be your day to watch me. I do have to more sensitive to infection now.
Two favors to ask everyone. Please do not send me jokes or unnecessary, sweet, little e-mails. My in-box is overflowing. Yes, they're nice, but I don't have time to read them or even figure out if I need to read them. I do love to get cards/post cards in the mail - P.O. Box 1884, Ouray, CO 81427. I think the art of letter writing has been lost.
Two, if you call, would you leave your number on the answering machine. You may save me a trip to walk in the other room. My legs really cramp up sometimes.
NO BLUE BELL!
I will also experience neuropathy (sp?) which is a side effect where you can't drink or have cold drinks, etc. I can't have ice cream for five days. At first I thought, Carol the infusion nurse (one of my favorites) said no ice cream ever again. I was especially bummed, as we are going south where they have "Blue Bell, the best ice cream in the country!" But it's just for five days. Little Creamery in Brenham, here I come.
Just up here in Colorado, not being a "girly-girl". I've got Hanz/Franz on my side.
Thanks you for your prayers. I pray fo us all.
Okay, I gotta to go take a pill.
Sincerly, Caroline
I may have cancer, but I'm having a good time!
Thursday, March 15, 2007
SLEDDING EGGS
Okay, I have much to update on the medical side, but I just have to tell this story first. This is that rich moment I mentioned in last Saturday's post - a lot of frustration came to a head for me.
I am losing some mobility in my left leg from the radiation on my hip bone. I don't really care, since my bone scan came back clear, and there's no sign of cancer. Since I'm on the steroids, I don't have any pain right now, but I've got pain meds as a back up when I'm off the steroids. If you watch the TV show, House, I sort of limp around like him and use a cane some. (If you don't watch House, you should. It's one of the best shows on TV. I'm totally hooked.) I even have a handicap sticker now for the car. What's really funny is we'll go someplace that has ten handicap places out front, and Robert will still park in the closest non-handicap place. And I'm like, park in the friggin' handicap spot - after all I've been through!
Things have really melted out in Ouray snow-wise, except of course, our front yard and the path to the car. I can get around town except for the first twenty feet outsdie my front door. It's slick, icy, on a hill, and I'm just terrified of falling. So last week, I had to come and go from the back door which we never use. It took me an hour to even find a key to that door, but I did find it.
So anyway, we had this major shopping expedition in Grand Junction last Friday after having chemo. We did Office Depot, PetSmart, Target, Vitamin Cottage, Michael's MJ Design, JoAnn's, Great Harvest Bread Company, and City Market (grocery store). Here I am "Miss Shop Local" hitting all the big box stores hoping I wouldn't run into anyone from Ouray, but hey, we'd already spent the gas money to get there. (We were back in GJ last Tuesday, and I shopped at several cool, independent places, which I'll report on later.) So many times after chemo Robert will say, do you want to stop here or there, and I'll say, let's just go home, I'm tired. Besides, we can get that stuff at home. I do usually have him stop for a dip cone at DQ.
So we had all this stuff to carry in on Friday night from the car. I just can't negotiate the yard, and I was feeling too impatient to have Robert back up the neighbor's driveway to go in the back door. Robert's telling me, don't worry, just let me get everything. I said I'll get the eggs - they're light. I was feeling so frustrated that I couldn't just grab bags and go up the hill as usual. I stomped up the neighbor's driveway and decided to cut across the deep snow in our yard on a lateral traverse. Well, the snow is knee deep, very stiff, and crunchy. It grabbed me and I just went over forward. I thought, Oh God, there go the eggs. It's all I have to handle, and I'm going to blow it. And in one of those slow motion kind of moments, the eggs went flying out of my arms. I thought they'll land in the snow and sink. But no, the surface of the snow is so hard, they went sliding down the hill. I thought, "Oh shit, they're organic and they cost an extra dollar." But the package for organic eggs has like these two double plastic layers, and they sledded down the hill and stopped. They didn't break.
Somehow, this made me feel like maybe I'm going to live longer than we all thought. I thought to myself, quit waiting to die, Caroline.
So I'm on steroids and I'm just going ninety miles an hour. I'm sure I'm driving people crazy, but I tell them I'm on drugs, and I'm not offended if they tell me I'm acting weird. It's kind of fun to go around a be the village idiot. My hands shake and sometimes I have the worst gas in the world, but I've decided this is no reason to just stay home in bed.
I met with two students from the film class today and we're going to start on a film to play at my funeral. I decided to start my planning funeral as I have too many control issues to let someone else do it. I figure if I'm ready, it won't happen. We've got the headstone thing done. I'll be doing a whole post on the plans later on. I AM SO JAZZED ABOUT DOING THIS FILM THING WITH THE SCHOOL! Thank you Nancy Nixon.
Last Sunday night we went to Tom & Linda Tyler's house for dinner. Jim & Chandriee Davis were in town from Estes Park and staying there. Jim used to work at the bookstore, and Chandriee & I worked at First National Bank together plus overlapped some at the Pinon Restaurant. (It's a small-town thing - you have these people you end up working with at different places.) Remind to tell you about setting my bangs on fire at the Pinon doing bananas foster.
Tuesday night, after another long day in GJ to see the doctor, we managed to go to the Elks and watch my team bowl. I've had to give up bowling for now, but I might be able to do it on an adaptive basis later on. (Or this leg thing may go away altogether - we don't know yet.) My team with Linda Tyler was bowling her husband's team with Tom Tyler. Plus Tom's team now has Warren Ruby, Ray Markey, and Phil Martinez - what a hoot. Bobby Morss has replaced me on The Harem. Thanks Bobby! You're a good fit for the girls.
Tonight, I did the silent auction for a joint fundraiser for the Mountain Rescue Team and the Museum. So last night, I stayed late at the bookstore late doing some cleaning and pulling some dead inventory for the auction. I put on the Beatles new Love CD from the Cirque de Soliel show (which is awesome) and cranked it up. I had this wonderful woman shopping in the store named Rudi, and we had fun talking. There's nothing like good music to get stuff done and some good girl conversation to boot.
Tonight, at the fundraiser, the crowd indulged me and let me auction some things at the verbal auction, and tell few stories. We were at the Western Hotel which used to house the Buen Tiempo, a very popular Mexican Restaurant where I moonlighted one winter (while I was City Treasurer!). I told you I was a workaholic.
I told a story about the night I had the whole back room at the Buen with like a 16-top, 10-top, 8 top, 6-top, and about ten other tables with no less than four at each. It was a Thursday night in the winter and we got slammed with a skeleton crew. No busser, rookie hostess, one bartender, manager's night off, second back-room waitress was a no-show. The waitress from the bar said you're on your own. Talk about dying and going to waitress hell. I thought, I can cry and give bad service, or smile and give bad service. So I smiled. I told people that we were in a crisis situation. I said get your shit together and be ready, cause I won't be back to your table for about 15 - 30 minutes. Nobody left, but I had a bunch of drink orders get cancelled.
MY NEXT PROJECT
Main Street is really full of gravel and dust currently which is driving us shop-owners nuts. Since Main Street is actually Highway 550, CDOT should maintain it, but they never do the sweeping. I keep telling my City Councilman husband will you please get Public Works to sweep the street. It looks like hell and someone could slip on the gravel. The street sweeper is broken at the City, and they're trying to get another town to come do it one day. I'm thinking that since I'm on steroids I'm just gonna go do it myself!
So I'm just up here in Colorado having a grand old time. I may have cancer, but I'm very happy. Life is good. I'm not leaving this earth until I'm ready. I've been talking to my liver, and I think I've got her on my side. (I've named my liver Luvera after a very special person in my life.) And I've been cussing those tumors out and told them they're not welcome anymore.
Thanks for keeping me alive with your prayers. Based on what the doctors tell me sometimes, that must be why I'm still here.
Sincerely, Caroline
P.S . The verbal auction brought in most the money, although we got about $300 on the silent auction. I feel good about that.
I am losing some mobility in my left leg from the radiation on my hip bone. I don't really care, since my bone scan came back clear, and there's no sign of cancer. Since I'm on the steroids, I don't have any pain right now, but I've got pain meds as a back up when I'm off the steroids. If you watch the TV show, House, I sort of limp around like him and use a cane some. (If you don't watch House, you should. It's one of the best shows on TV. I'm totally hooked.) I even have a handicap sticker now for the car. What's really funny is we'll go someplace that has ten handicap places out front, and Robert will still park in the closest non-handicap place. And I'm like, park in the friggin' handicap spot - after all I've been through!
Things have really melted out in Ouray snow-wise, except of course, our front yard and the path to the car. I can get around town except for the first twenty feet outsdie my front door. It's slick, icy, on a hill, and I'm just terrified of falling. So last week, I had to come and go from the back door which we never use. It took me an hour to even find a key to that door, but I did find it.
So anyway, we had this major shopping expedition in Grand Junction last Friday after having chemo. We did Office Depot, PetSmart, Target, Vitamin Cottage, Michael's MJ Design, JoAnn's, Great Harvest Bread Company, and City Market (grocery store). Here I am "Miss Shop Local" hitting all the big box stores hoping I wouldn't run into anyone from Ouray, but hey, we'd already spent the gas money to get there. (We were back in GJ last Tuesday, and I shopped at several cool, independent places, which I'll report on later.) So many times after chemo Robert will say, do you want to stop here or there, and I'll say, let's just go home, I'm tired. Besides, we can get that stuff at home. I do usually have him stop for a dip cone at DQ.
So we had all this stuff to carry in on Friday night from the car. I just can't negotiate the yard, and I was feeling too impatient to have Robert back up the neighbor's driveway to go in the back door. Robert's telling me, don't worry, just let me get everything. I said I'll get the eggs - they're light. I was feeling so frustrated that I couldn't just grab bags and go up the hill as usual. I stomped up the neighbor's driveway and decided to cut across the deep snow in our yard on a lateral traverse. Well, the snow is knee deep, very stiff, and crunchy. It grabbed me and I just went over forward. I thought, Oh God, there go the eggs. It's all I have to handle, and I'm going to blow it. And in one of those slow motion kind of moments, the eggs went flying out of my arms. I thought they'll land in the snow and sink. But no, the surface of the snow is so hard, they went sliding down the hill. I thought, "Oh shit, they're organic and they cost an extra dollar." But the package for organic eggs has like these two double plastic layers, and they sledded down the hill and stopped. They didn't break.
Somehow, this made me feel like maybe I'm going to live longer than we all thought. I thought to myself, quit waiting to die, Caroline.
So I'm on steroids and I'm just going ninety miles an hour. I'm sure I'm driving people crazy, but I tell them I'm on drugs, and I'm not offended if they tell me I'm acting weird. It's kind of fun to go around a be the village idiot. My hands shake and sometimes I have the worst gas in the world, but I've decided this is no reason to just stay home in bed.
I met with two students from the film class today and we're going to start on a film to play at my funeral. I decided to start my planning funeral as I have too many control issues to let someone else do it. I figure if I'm ready, it won't happen. We've got the headstone thing done. I'll be doing a whole post on the plans later on. I AM SO JAZZED ABOUT DOING THIS FILM THING WITH THE SCHOOL! Thank you Nancy Nixon.
Last Sunday night we went to Tom & Linda Tyler's house for dinner. Jim & Chandriee Davis were in town from Estes Park and staying there. Jim used to work at the bookstore, and Chandriee & I worked at First National Bank together plus overlapped some at the Pinon Restaurant. (It's a small-town thing - you have these people you end up working with at different places.) Remind to tell you about setting my bangs on fire at the Pinon doing bananas foster.
Tuesday night, after another long day in GJ to see the doctor, we managed to go to the Elks and watch my team bowl. I've had to give up bowling for now, but I might be able to do it on an adaptive basis later on. (Or this leg thing may go away altogether - we don't know yet.) My team with Linda Tyler was bowling her husband's team with Tom Tyler. Plus Tom's team now has Warren Ruby, Ray Markey, and Phil Martinez - what a hoot. Bobby Morss has replaced me on The Harem. Thanks Bobby! You're a good fit for the girls.
Tonight, I did the silent auction for a joint fundraiser for the Mountain Rescue Team and the Museum. So last night, I stayed late at the bookstore late doing some cleaning and pulling some dead inventory for the auction. I put on the Beatles new Love CD from the Cirque de Soliel show (which is awesome) and cranked it up. I had this wonderful woman shopping in the store named Rudi, and we had fun talking. There's nothing like good music to get stuff done and some good girl conversation to boot.
Tonight, at the fundraiser, the crowd indulged me and let me auction some things at the verbal auction, and tell few stories. We were at the Western Hotel which used to house the Buen Tiempo, a very popular Mexican Restaurant where I moonlighted one winter (while I was City Treasurer!). I told you I was a workaholic.
I told a story about the night I had the whole back room at the Buen with like a 16-top, 10-top, 8 top, 6-top, and about ten other tables with no less than four at each. It was a Thursday night in the winter and we got slammed with a skeleton crew. No busser, rookie hostess, one bartender, manager's night off, second back-room waitress was a no-show. The waitress from the bar said you're on your own. Talk about dying and going to waitress hell. I thought, I can cry and give bad service, or smile and give bad service. So I smiled. I told people that we were in a crisis situation. I said get your shit together and be ready, cause I won't be back to your table for about 15 - 30 minutes. Nobody left, but I had a bunch of drink orders get cancelled.
MY NEXT PROJECT
Main Street is really full of gravel and dust currently which is driving us shop-owners nuts. Since Main Street is actually Highway 550, CDOT should maintain it, but they never do the sweeping. I keep telling my City Councilman husband will you please get Public Works to sweep the street. It looks like hell and someone could slip on the gravel. The street sweeper is broken at the City, and they're trying to get another town to come do it one day. I'm thinking that since I'm on steroids I'm just gonna go do it myself!
So I'm just up here in Colorado having a grand old time. I may have cancer, but I'm very happy. Life is good. I'm not leaving this earth until I'm ready. I've been talking to my liver, and I think I've got her on my side. (I've named my liver Luvera after a very special person in my life.) And I've been cussing those tumors out and told them they're not welcome anymore.
Thanks for keeping me alive with your prayers. Based on what the doctors tell me sometimes, that must be why I'm still here.
Sincerely, Caroline
P.S . The verbal auction brought in most the money, although we got about $300 on the silent auction. I feel good about that.
Saturday, March 10, 2007
BE CARREFUL WHAT YOU WISH FOR!
Having cancer is not all bad. There are some up-sides. Whenever someone asked you what would you wish for if you had that Genie from the bottle, did you say something like win the lottery? Or for one wild impetuous night, to be the meat in an Antonio Banderas - Benecio Del Toro love sandwich. (Just kidding, my husband is all I can handle.) Or to be able to eat anything you want and not gain weight.
As I have said in the past, I spent most of my adult life dieting, mostly on Weight Watchers, and now, I can eat anything I want and not really gain weight. (I actually worked for Weight Watchers twice as a group leader.) I've been pretty lucky holding my weight stable. I've read that many cancer patients die of malnutrition rather than the cancer itself as they start losing weight.
Sometimes I don't have a big appetite, but I manage to get some calories in there somehow. I do "reverse Weight Watchers". Lots of bread. I have ice cream almost every night. Last night, we went to a Chinese buffet in Montrose on our way home from chemo. Usually, we choose that restaurant because I have been queasy and I get soup, rice, and one of the blander dishes with vegetables. They usually make money off me, but not last night. I went to every table and had something off each one. God, it was good! They had crab legs with drawn butter. I hadn't felt like fish or seafood in so long.
ANOTHER WISH COME TRUE
I used to be so busy and just enjoy accomplishing things, that it really pissed me off that I had to sleep at night. Well, not anymore. I can stay up all night. I do try to lie down and be still for a few hours and sometimes I do sleep. (By the way, in my last post, the reason I didn't go to sleep that night is that I took an Oxycodone instead of an Ambien CR by mistake.) A friend of mine told me that the CR makes her have wild dreams like me, but the regular Ambien works better. Does anyone have an opinion on this? Yep, I was a work-aholic. Maybe that's what gave me cancer. In addition to eating fiber, be sure to get your down time. I get lots of it now, and I'm relishing my leisure.
GOTTA RUN - MORE LATER ABOUT YESTERDAY'S CHEMO APPOINTMENT!
I just looked at the time and realized I need to get to the bookstore. Elwood is working today and I told him it's his day to "watch me". Robert & a friend went rockhounding in the "west end" of Montrose County today - a much needed respite for him I'm sure. Nothing makes him happier than to go dig for rocks and commune with nature.
I told Robert yesterday morning that if I was babbling on and driving him crazy, just to tell me, and I'd be quiet 'cause we know it's the steroids. I don't get offended - I know it's the meds and I know it's a good thing for him to ask me to time out. He did do this several times yesterday. As I get older, I don't like to listen anyone rattle on too long about anything, but when I was a younger woman, boy, could I blab my face off. (Just ask my ex, Lance.) I still have some girlfriends with which I have very productive blab-fests, but I don't like to talk like I did when I was younger, and I think that's a good thing - no more verbal diarrhea. I guess we do grow up.
Okay, gotta scoot. More later. Love ya. Bye!
Oh, I did have a rich moment last night that I have to tell you about. Later.
Just up here in Colorado, enjoying my steroids, but I will be glad to sleep again. Dr. Bergen said it was okay not to take the sleeping med. He said no one ever died from insomnia. (I guess unless you fell asleep at the wheel. But Robert said if you fell asleep it wouldn't be insomnia.)
Sincerely, Caroline
As I have said in the past, I spent most of my adult life dieting, mostly on Weight Watchers, and now, I can eat anything I want and not really gain weight. (I actually worked for Weight Watchers twice as a group leader.) I've been pretty lucky holding my weight stable. I've read that many cancer patients die of malnutrition rather than the cancer itself as they start losing weight.
Sometimes I don't have a big appetite, but I manage to get some calories in there somehow. I do "reverse Weight Watchers". Lots of bread. I have ice cream almost every night. Last night, we went to a Chinese buffet in Montrose on our way home from chemo. Usually, we choose that restaurant because I have been queasy and I get soup, rice, and one of the blander dishes with vegetables. They usually make money off me, but not last night. I went to every table and had something off each one. God, it was good! They had crab legs with drawn butter. I hadn't felt like fish or seafood in so long.
ANOTHER WISH COME TRUE
I used to be so busy and just enjoy accomplishing things, that it really pissed me off that I had to sleep at night. Well, not anymore. I can stay up all night. I do try to lie down and be still for a few hours and sometimes I do sleep. (By the way, in my last post, the reason I didn't go to sleep that night is that I took an Oxycodone instead of an Ambien CR by mistake.) A friend of mine told me that the CR makes her have wild dreams like me, but the regular Ambien works better. Does anyone have an opinion on this? Yep, I was a work-aholic. Maybe that's what gave me cancer. In addition to eating fiber, be sure to get your down time. I get lots of it now, and I'm relishing my leisure.
GOTTA RUN - MORE LATER ABOUT YESTERDAY'S CHEMO APPOINTMENT!
I just looked at the time and realized I need to get to the bookstore. Elwood is working today and I told him it's his day to "watch me". Robert & a friend went rockhounding in the "west end" of Montrose County today - a much needed respite for him I'm sure. Nothing makes him happier than to go dig for rocks and commune with nature.
I told Robert yesterday morning that if I was babbling on and driving him crazy, just to tell me, and I'd be quiet 'cause we know it's the steroids. I don't get offended - I know it's the meds and I know it's a good thing for him to ask me to time out. He did do this several times yesterday. As I get older, I don't like to listen anyone rattle on too long about anything, but when I was a younger woman, boy, could I blab my face off. (Just ask my ex, Lance.) I still have some girlfriends with which I have very productive blab-fests, but I don't like to talk like I did when I was younger, and I think that's a good thing - no more verbal diarrhea. I guess we do grow up.
Okay, gotta scoot. More later. Love ya. Bye!
Oh, I did have a rich moment last night that I have to tell you about. Later.
Just up here in Colorado, enjoying my steroids, but I will be glad to sleep again. Dr. Bergen said it was okay not to take the sleeping med. He said no one ever died from insomnia. (I guess unless you fell asleep at the wheel. But Robert said if you fell asleep it wouldn't be insomnia.)
Sincerely, Caroline
Tuesday, March 06, 2007
The Joy of Steroids
LEG GRADUALLY DOING BETTER
Boy, am I feeling better since I got back on daily steroids last week! I am definitely alive and almost kicking. Unfortunately, I do still have pain in my left leg, and I've had to give up bowling, at least for now. Better no new cancer and no bowling than the alternative. I can get around pretty good, but I can't entirely bend my thigh. I can carefully get down on the floor and back up if necessary. With the energy from the steroids, I am moving around a lot, which causes the leg to swell some. I had to spend some time this evening with the frozen peas on it (which makes a great ice pack). I am doing more in one hour now than I was doing all day before when I had so much fatigue.
I took one Ibuprofen today, but it didn't do anything. Guess it's gotta be two. I haven't used the Oxycodone since last Fridy due to the plugging up it causes. Sorry if my last post had too much information on constipation, but this blog is for other cholangio sufferers, and I think my candor can be helpful. However, I'll try to be less descriptive. "Pooty" problems come with the territory of cancer - all the best drugs either stop you up or cause the inverse.
We see Dr. Bergen this Friday to see if I can have chemo this week. Also, I see Dr. Kane from CU Med Center of Denver at the Montrose Oncology Center next Monday, just to check on any new procedures that might be available.
HOUSE PROJECTS
I'm having such better days. It's so nice to feel good again. I worked on cleaning our kitchen and frig last weekend, even rearranging the photos and magnets covering the refrigerator doors. Cleaning the kitchen causes one to think of so many people. So & so brought me this magnet from their vacation. This utensil was a Christmas present from a relative and I couldn't live without it. I rememer when I bought this bowl twenty years ago at the craft fair. So many wonderful memories you can hold in your hand. Anyway, we had quite a food museum going in the frig and the back reaches of some cupboards, and I am proud of my progess. We eat almost entirely at home now, so the kitchen needed to be put in order.
Before I got back on steroids, I took down the Christmas tree around February 24th. I know this will horrify some people, but we put our tree up really late, like on Christmas Eve, so if I get it down by Valentine's Day, I think I'm doing pretty good. (When I used to work so much, Easter was my goal.) I put the ornamnents in zip-loc bags with notes about where I think they all came from, like "I got this batch of ornaments in December 1993 when I was divorced and living in Denver. I bought all my gas that month at 7-11 to collect all five of these". I left a note at the top of the Christmas ornament box for Robert and Ian. I told them that based on the way I felt that day, I couldn't imagine still being alive at Christmas, and wished them love and Merry Christmas. But you know, I have new hope. Maybe I will make one more holiday.
PET SCANS, BODYWORKS
Last November when we drove to Las Vegas to spend time with my sisters, I picked up a Salt Lake City newspaper in Green River, Wyoming. (Mostly I was reading about the Jeffreys case.) But I noticed an ad for a PT Scan for about $650 at a hospital in SLC. My advice is that if you can afford it, get one, even if your insurance won't pay for it. It is like a low resolution CT scan of your whole body. And unfortunately, many things don't show up until it's too late. At least consider an ultrasound on your liver.
I can't remember if I mentioned this in the blog before or not, but while I was in Arizona in February, my sisters and I went to see the Bodyworks 3 exhibition in Phoenix. I was really afraid my sisters would get squeamish, but I was the one who had trouble looking at everything, It was very interesting and helpful to me. I got to see many livers with tumors. Some were cross-sections, one display had a torso of organs with an enlarged liver. I also got to see the vascular system of the liver which is an incredible looking tangle of wires. I may consider seeding in my arteries, but I don't know how they're ever sure if they're sending the seeds to the right place. They do arterial mapping. The night after I saw the exhibit, I dreamed that my liver had enlarged and I woke up looking pregnant. In the dream, I was yelling, "I have to call Dr. Bergen!"
INSOMNIA
Well, the down side to steroids is not sleeping. I took an Ambien CR at midnight and it's now 5:20 am and I just can't go to sleep. The brain is in high gear. I used to be like this all the time when I was working - toss & turn, worry about stuff, make lists, etc. The last two nights, the Ambien worked better although I only slept about six hours yesterday evening. Usually it knocks me out for 8 to 10 hours. I'm on six dexamethasone a day, and I think I need to try to get them into my body earlier in the day. Last night, I took a bunch of meds right at bed time. I read an article on Johnny Depp from a 2003 GQ that I'd been saving to read and finally got around to. When I fell asleep last night, I was seeing these tall, thin, black & white zombie cartoons like something out of a Tim Burton movie. But they didn't scare me. They were friendly and got sparkly when I talked to them. But I kept tossing in my sleep and telling them to go away.
It's a wild ride on the medications sometimes. Or maybe it's the pooty problems. I'm full of gas these days - fartin' like a jack-rabbit. I'm not sure what that means, but I think it has something to do with how they hop.
Just up here in Colorado, very glad to be alive despite the ups and downs. I love this world and I'm not ready to leave yet. Thanks for all your prayers.
Sincerely, Caroline
Boy, am I feeling better since I got back on daily steroids last week! I am definitely alive and almost kicking. Unfortunately, I do still have pain in my left leg, and I've had to give up bowling, at least for now. Better no new cancer and no bowling than the alternative. I can get around pretty good, but I can't entirely bend my thigh. I can carefully get down on the floor and back up if necessary. With the energy from the steroids, I am moving around a lot, which causes the leg to swell some. I had to spend some time this evening with the frozen peas on it (which makes a great ice pack). I am doing more in one hour now than I was doing all day before when I had so much fatigue.
I took one Ibuprofen today, but it didn't do anything. Guess it's gotta be two. I haven't used the Oxycodone since last Fridy due to the plugging up it causes. Sorry if my last post had too much information on constipation, but this blog is for other cholangio sufferers, and I think my candor can be helpful. However, I'll try to be less descriptive. "Pooty" problems come with the territory of cancer - all the best drugs either stop you up or cause the inverse.
We see Dr. Bergen this Friday to see if I can have chemo this week. Also, I see Dr. Kane from CU Med Center of Denver at the Montrose Oncology Center next Monday, just to check on any new procedures that might be available.
HOUSE PROJECTS
I'm having such better days. It's so nice to feel good again. I worked on cleaning our kitchen and frig last weekend, even rearranging the photos and magnets covering the refrigerator doors. Cleaning the kitchen causes one to think of so many people. So & so brought me this magnet from their vacation. This utensil was a Christmas present from a relative and I couldn't live without it. I rememer when I bought this bowl twenty years ago at the craft fair. So many wonderful memories you can hold in your hand. Anyway, we had quite a food museum going in the frig and the back reaches of some cupboards, and I am proud of my progess. We eat almost entirely at home now, so the kitchen needed to be put in order.
Before I got back on steroids, I took down the Christmas tree around February 24th. I know this will horrify some people, but we put our tree up really late, like on Christmas Eve, so if I get it down by Valentine's Day, I think I'm doing pretty good. (When I used to work so much, Easter was my goal.) I put the ornamnents in zip-loc bags with notes about where I think they all came from, like "I got this batch of ornaments in December 1993 when I was divorced and living in Denver. I bought all my gas that month at 7-11 to collect all five of these". I left a note at the top of the Christmas ornament box for Robert and Ian. I told them that based on the way I felt that day, I couldn't imagine still being alive at Christmas, and wished them love and Merry Christmas. But you know, I have new hope. Maybe I will make one more holiday.
PET SCANS, BODYWORKS
Last November when we drove to Las Vegas to spend time with my sisters, I picked up a Salt Lake City newspaper in Green River, Wyoming. (Mostly I was reading about the Jeffreys case.) But I noticed an ad for a PT Scan for about $650 at a hospital in SLC. My advice is that if you can afford it, get one, even if your insurance won't pay for it. It is like a low resolution CT scan of your whole body. And unfortunately, many things don't show up until it's too late. At least consider an ultrasound on your liver.
I can't remember if I mentioned this in the blog before or not, but while I was in Arizona in February, my sisters and I went to see the Bodyworks 3 exhibition in Phoenix. I was really afraid my sisters would get squeamish, but I was the one who had trouble looking at everything, It was very interesting and helpful to me. I got to see many livers with tumors. Some were cross-sections, one display had a torso of organs with an enlarged liver. I also got to see the vascular system of the liver which is an incredible looking tangle of wires. I may consider seeding in my arteries, but I don't know how they're ever sure if they're sending the seeds to the right place. They do arterial mapping. The night after I saw the exhibit, I dreamed that my liver had enlarged and I woke up looking pregnant. In the dream, I was yelling, "I have to call Dr. Bergen!"
INSOMNIA
Well, the down side to steroids is not sleeping. I took an Ambien CR at midnight and it's now 5:20 am and I just can't go to sleep. The brain is in high gear. I used to be like this all the time when I was working - toss & turn, worry about stuff, make lists, etc. The last two nights, the Ambien worked better although I only slept about six hours yesterday evening. Usually it knocks me out for 8 to 10 hours. I'm on six dexamethasone a day, and I think I need to try to get them into my body earlier in the day. Last night, I took a bunch of meds right at bed time. I read an article on Johnny Depp from a 2003 GQ that I'd been saving to read and finally got around to. When I fell asleep last night, I was seeing these tall, thin, black & white zombie cartoons like something out of a Tim Burton movie. But they didn't scare me. They were friendly and got sparkly when I talked to them. But I kept tossing in my sleep and telling them to go away.
It's a wild ride on the medications sometimes. Or maybe it's the pooty problems. I'm full of gas these days - fartin' like a jack-rabbit. I'm not sure what that means, but I think it has something to do with how they hop.
Just up here in Colorado, very glad to be alive despite the ups and downs. I love this world and I'm not ready to leave yet. Thanks for all your prayers.
Sincerely, Caroline
Friday, March 02, 2007
Can You Say Radiation Myositis?
I'm sorry I haven't posted more, but I have really been laid up this week, mostly with pain in my left leg in the area where I had radiation. I've also had the worst constipation I've ever experienced, despite taking stool softeners, laxatives, eating prunes, drinking fluids. I was reluctant to take my pain medication, Oxycodone, as it causes the constipation. I was getting cramps from the laxatives and had intense bloating (you know how cranky that makes us gals). I had been told to take Ibuprofen sparingly and try to stay off it for one or two days a week.
Last night I was in tears on the toilet. I had not shat for four days. My leg hurt so bad that Robert had to help me get up and downstairs and into bed by picking up my leg up for me. I took some Ibuprofen early in the day even though it was supposed to be a day off, but it had already worn off. I cried to my husband Robert, "I'm in so much pain I can barely walk, and I'm full of sh_t!" So he gave me some more Ibuprofen, and we found a solution (by Mr. Fleet) to move the concrete lodged somewhere in my intestines. I was grateful we didn't have to use dynamite!
I had an MRI today in Grand Junction, the first one I've ever had. We found the cause of the leg pain, which is very rare - "radiation myositis" induced by recall phenomenon. Apparently, gemcitabine (Gemzar) can cause a recall reaction of radiation side effects, even ones not experienced during the radiation itself. Dr. Bergen said there was a remote possibility I'd get the radiation sunburn once I started back on Gemzar. (I didn't ever get the radiation "burn, nor sore muscles.) There have been so few cases of the inflamed muscles from radiation recall, they're not exactly sure how to treat it. I'm going back on steroids to reduce inflammation. (Look out, Robert, I'll want to work on 17 projects at once, plus rearrange all the furniture in the house.) I can stay with the Oxycodone and have a new Rx for a different laxative. And I can stay on Ibuprofen as described above.
Needless to say, we were so relieved today to find out that the pain was not the result of the cancer spreading. Dr. Bergen and Nurse Amy were very happy. I had been feeling so bad physically that I was afraid/depressed that I'd never pull out of it, but now I have hope again. We are planning to go on a trip later this month to a book show in Austin, Texas and to see Robert's family in Mississippi, and I think we'll be able to do that now.
I didn't bowl this week, and it looks like I may have to give that up. The pain really came on last weekend after I bowled on Friday night.
So that is it for now. Thank you, God! I'm going to try to get some sleep despite getting an infusion of steroids in my port today. Thanks to my husband Robert who has taken such good care of me when I've been so incapacitate these past few weeks. You rock, honey!
Just up here in Colorado looking forward to Spring!
Sincerely, Caroline
Last night I was in tears on the toilet. I had not shat for four days. My leg hurt so bad that Robert had to help me get up and downstairs and into bed by picking up my leg up for me. I took some Ibuprofen early in the day even though it was supposed to be a day off, but it had already worn off. I cried to my husband Robert, "I'm in so much pain I can barely walk, and I'm full of sh_t!" So he gave me some more Ibuprofen, and we found a solution (by Mr. Fleet) to move the concrete lodged somewhere in my intestines. I was grateful we didn't have to use dynamite!
I had an MRI today in Grand Junction, the first one I've ever had. We found the cause of the leg pain, which is very rare - "radiation myositis" induced by recall phenomenon. Apparently, gemcitabine (Gemzar) can cause a recall reaction of radiation side effects, even ones not experienced during the radiation itself. Dr. Bergen said there was a remote possibility I'd get the radiation sunburn once I started back on Gemzar. (I didn't ever get the radiation "burn, nor sore muscles.) There have been so few cases of the inflamed muscles from radiation recall, they're not exactly sure how to treat it. I'm going back on steroids to reduce inflammation. (Look out, Robert, I'll want to work on 17 projects at once, plus rearrange all the furniture in the house.) I can stay with the Oxycodone and have a new Rx for a different laxative. And I can stay on Ibuprofen as described above.
Needless to say, we were so relieved today to find out that the pain was not the result of the cancer spreading. Dr. Bergen and Nurse Amy were very happy. I had been feeling so bad physically that I was afraid/depressed that I'd never pull out of it, but now I have hope again. We are planning to go on a trip later this month to a book show in Austin, Texas and to see Robert's family in Mississippi, and I think we'll be able to do that now.
I didn't bowl this week, and it looks like I may have to give that up. The pain really came on last weekend after I bowled on Friday night.
So that is it for now. Thank you, God! I'm going to try to get some sleep despite getting an infusion of steroids in my port today. Thanks to my husband Robert who has taken such good care of me when I've been so incapacitate these past few weeks. You rock, honey!
Just up here in Colorado looking forward to Spring!
Sincerely, Caroline
Sunday, February 25, 2007
Left Leg Really Hurts Today - No Radio Show
I have a pain in my upper left thigh that seems to be in the muscle. It really hurts today. I think it is from the chemo because sometimes my right thigh hurts, too. I think I'll just plan to stay in today. I don't want to risk falling on any snow or ice. So, no radio show today. We're keeping any eye on this for a while. I may have to have another scan to see what it might be. So many pains come and go, but this one is starting to hang on.
I did bowl on Friday night. I had steroids the day before so the pain in my leg was much less and I took some Ibuprofen. This is a "No-Tap" league, so if you hit nine pins on the first ball, it counts as a strike. I bowled 107, 131, and 151. My average is 130 and handicap is 50. We lost three of four games. If this leg doesn't get better, I may have to give the bowling up. My team member Peggy Lindsay bowled a 218 in the last game, and it wasn't all nine-pin strikes. Way to go Peg!
Guess that's it for today. As always, thanks everyone for your prayers and kind thoughts. My eternal thanks to my husband Robert who is so good to me. And some special love out to my cousin Barbara in Nebraska who just had surgery on her lymph nodes.
Just up here in Colorado, nursing a sore leg.
Sincerely, Caroline
I did bowl on Friday night. I had steroids the day before so the pain in my leg was much less and I took some Ibuprofen. This is a "No-Tap" league, so if you hit nine pins on the first ball, it counts as a strike. I bowled 107, 131, and 151. My average is 130 and handicap is 50. We lost three of four games. If this leg doesn't get better, I may have to give the bowling up. My team member Peggy Lindsay bowled a 218 in the last game, and it wasn't all nine-pin strikes. Way to go Peg!
Guess that's it for today. As always, thanks everyone for your prayers and kind thoughts. My eternal thanks to my husband Robert who is so good to me. And some special love out to my cousin Barbara in Nebraska who just had surgery on her lymph nodes.
Just up here in Colorado, nursing a sore leg.
Sincerely, Caroline
Friday, February 23, 2007
Steroids - They're Not Just for Athletes Anymore
Apologies again for not posting more often, but I felt pretty crummy this past week - mostly fatigue and pain, mostly in my left thigh which made it hard to walk. I've also had a cold, queasiness/nausea, insomnia, digestive issues, headaches, and chemo brain which makes it hard to concentrate or focus sometimes. That in turn makes me frustrated and irritable, but I tell myself to take it slower. I had chemo yesterday, and I got the attendant steroids beforehand which has made the pain in my leg better and given me more energy. So I'm feeling better today just in time for my first bowling night in the new league. Both Dr. Bergen and Dr. Oldroyd have told me it's okay to bowl.
I took some Provigil last Monday afternoon to help with fatigue and I didn't got to sleep until 7am the next morning. (I watched three movies, two HBO specials on prostitutes, and did three Kakuro puzzles.) I had an appointment Tuesday with the radiation oncologist, so I got about one hour of sleep the night before, but lately I've been sleeping very soundly, even with the steroids yesterday. Dr. Oldroyd said my last bone scan showed no more cancer in my bones, so we are very happy about that.
CHEMO TREATMENTS
I had chemo a week ago today and then again yesterday. Last Friday, my blood work was pretty good, hemoglobin at 12, but two liver enzymes a bit elevated. I only had Gemzar last week. CA19-9 tumor marker back up to 2900+. last week, but down to 2346 this week. Yesterday, I had Gemzar and Avastin, plus an Aranesp shot - my hemoglobin fell to 11.3. Only one liver enzyme was elevated. My weight and blood pressure have been good at all check-ups.
Last Friday, we went to see Norbitt on the way home in Montrose. We called Art & Brenda Fox and they met us at the theater. We went to Garlic Mike's in Montrose afterwards and it was very good. Norbitt was pretty good, and I love Eddie Murphy movies where he does multiple rolls. Coming to American and The Nutty Professor were better in my opinion. (I laughed so hard at the opening scene of The Nutty Professor that I sucked down a Milk-Dud and I thought Robert was going to have to do the Heimlich on me.) If you have seen the previews for Norbitt, you know that Norbitt's wife is a very big girl. She often accuses Norbitt of moving the seat forward in her car as she honks the horn with her boobs. Last Saturday, long-legged Robert drove my car after short-legged me. He accused me of moving the seat up, imitating Norbitt's wife. I replied, "Okay, Robert, let's see you honk the horn with those man titties."
I don't have to have chemo next week. Dr. Bergen wants to give me a break from Gemzar. I will continue to take Xeloda as long as my feet and hands aren't swelling too much.
Every time we go to Grand Junction, we usually see at least one bald eagle along the way either along the river in Ridgway or up near Colona on the Ouray-Montrose county line. Last week we saw a bunch prairie dogs up near Grand Junction. Last Saturday, we went to Ridgway to the pharmacy and saw a sheep sleeping on a picnic table at a house near Ridgway. The ground was full of snow and I'm sure the the brown table was warm from the sun.
MANAGING CHEMO SIDE EFFECTS
Chemo Brain - I asked Dr. Bergen last Friday if there really was such a thing as Chemo Brain. He said yes there is, and it is his fault for giving it to me. He thought there might be a clinical trial I could get into with regard to chemo brain, but it was closed. He said I could take ginko if I wanted. I took one last Saturday, but it didn't seem to do anything. Then I noticed that bottle was about 3 years beyond it's expiration date. I got a new bottle and will try again next time it comes up.
Fatigue - I mentioned before the Provigil which I will probably try again at half dose and only take in the morning. There's a clinical trial to test Provigil in helping with fatigue from chemo, but I had already taken some samples that I got earlier in the year, so I am not eligible for that trial. But any of you cancer patients out there suffering from chemo fatigue, ask your oncologist about it or go online to clinicaltrials.gov.
Pain/Headaches - I've been taking Ibuprofen which seems to help, but I can only take so much of it. I also take Oxycodone which can make you extremely constipated. I'd forgotten to take the stool softeners with it, and I'll never do that again. (If we can put a man on the moon, why can't we make a toilet that accommodates the largest human turd?) When I have chemo and get steroids, it reduces the pain I have in various places - thighs, shoulders, abdomen, headache, back of neck.
Queasiness/Nausea - Mostly, I am just queasy, but sometimes it feels like it's going to get worse. I've been taking Kytril. I also take Prilosec which seems to help as well.
We rented two movies at Blockbuster and watched Babel the other night which was quite good. I watched most of Half Nelson and Ryan Gosling is very deserving of his best actor nomination. Of course, we'll be watching the Oscars on Sunday night. I am hooked on American Idol. The girls are way better than the guys this year. I think Lakisha will take it - what a voice.
I sometimes feel like two different people - the girl on steroids and the woman who can hardly get out of bed. I asked Robert if he felt like he was married to two different women, and he replied, "At least."
Just up here in Colorado, both of me still enjoying life.
Sincerely, Caroline
P.S. To stream my radio show on the internet, go to kara.fast-serv.com:9262/listen.pls. I do not know how to use this yet, but I'll find out. I should be doing my show this Sunday from 1:00 - 4:00 pm Mountain Time. Sometimes I run a few minutes late to the station.
I took some Provigil last Monday afternoon to help with fatigue and I didn't got to sleep until 7am the next morning. (I watched three movies, two HBO specials on prostitutes, and did three Kakuro puzzles.) I had an appointment Tuesday with the radiation oncologist, so I got about one hour of sleep the night before, but lately I've been sleeping very soundly, even with the steroids yesterday. Dr. Oldroyd said my last bone scan showed no more cancer in my bones, so we are very happy about that.
CHEMO TREATMENTS
I had chemo a week ago today and then again yesterday. Last Friday, my blood work was pretty good, hemoglobin at 12, but two liver enzymes a bit elevated. I only had Gemzar last week. CA19-9 tumor marker back up to 2900+. last week, but down to 2346 this week. Yesterday, I had Gemzar and Avastin, plus an Aranesp shot - my hemoglobin fell to 11.3. Only one liver enzyme was elevated. My weight and blood pressure have been good at all check-ups.
Last Friday, we went to see Norbitt on the way home in Montrose. We called Art & Brenda Fox and they met us at the theater. We went to Garlic Mike's in Montrose afterwards and it was very good. Norbitt was pretty good, and I love Eddie Murphy movies where he does multiple rolls. Coming to American and The Nutty Professor were better in my opinion. (I laughed so hard at the opening scene of The Nutty Professor that I sucked down a Milk-Dud and I thought Robert was going to have to do the Heimlich on me.) If you have seen the previews for Norbitt, you know that Norbitt's wife is a very big girl. She often accuses Norbitt of moving the seat forward in her car as she honks the horn with her boobs. Last Saturday, long-legged Robert drove my car after short-legged me. He accused me of moving the seat up, imitating Norbitt's wife. I replied, "Okay, Robert, let's see you honk the horn with those man titties."
I don't have to have chemo next week. Dr. Bergen wants to give me a break from Gemzar. I will continue to take Xeloda as long as my feet and hands aren't swelling too much.
Every time we go to Grand Junction, we usually see at least one bald eagle along the way either along the river in Ridgway or up near Colona on the Ouray-Montrose county line. Last week we saw a bunch prairie dogs up near Grand Junction. Last Saturday, we went to Ridgway to the pharmacy and saw a sheep sleeping on a picnic table at a house near Ridgway. The ground was full of snow and I'm sure the the brown table was warm from the sun.
MANAGING CHEMO SIDE EFFECTS
Chemo Brain - I asked Dr. Bergen last Friday if there really was such a thing as Chemo Brain. He said yes there is, and it is his fault for giving it to me. He thought there might be a clinical trial I could get into with regard to chemo brain, but it was closed. He said I could take ginko if I wanted. I took one last Saturday, but it didn't seem to do anything. Then I noticed that bottle was about 3 years beyond it's expiration date. I got a new bottle and will try again next time it comes up.
Fatigue - I mentioned before the Provigil which I will probably try again at half dose and only take in the morning. There's a clinical trial to test Provigil in helping with fatigue from chemo, but I had already taken some samples that I got earlier in the year, so I am not eligible for that trial. But any of you cancer patients out there suffering from chemo fatigue, ask your oncologist about it or go online to clinicaltrials.gov.
Pain/Headaches - I've been taking Ibuprofen which seems to help, but I can only take so much of it. I also take Oxycodone which can make you extremely constipated. I'd forgotten to take the stool softeners with it, and I'll never do that again. (If we can put a man on the moon, why can't we make a toilet that accommodates the largest human turd?) When I have chemo and get steroids, it reduces the pain I have in various places - thighs, shoulders, abdomen, headache, back of neck.
Queasiness/Nausea - Mostly, I am just queasy, but sometimes it feels like it's going to get worse. I've been taking Kytril. I also take Prilosec which seems to help as well.
We rented two movies at Blockbuster and watched Babel the other night which was quite good. I watched most of Half Nelson and Ryan Gosling is very deserving of his best actor nomination. Of course, we'll be watching the Oscars on Sunday night. I am hooked on American Idol. The girls are way better than the guys this year. I think Lakisha will take it - what a voice.
I sometimes feel like two different people - the girl on steroids and the woman who can hardly get out of bed. I asked Robert if he felt like he was married to two different women, and he replied, "At least."
Just up here in Colorado, both of me still enjoying life.
Sincerely, Caroline
P.S. To stream my radio show on the internet, go to kara.fast-serv.com:9262/listen.pls. I do not know how to use this yet, but I'll find out. I should be doing my show this Sunday from 1:00 - 4:00 pm Mountain Time. Sometimes I run a few minutes late to the station.
Thursday, February 15, 2007
Good News
The oncology nurse called today and said my bone scan was okay. My tumor marker was down to 2,361. It was 2900+ on 1-18-07. Normal is 0 -37, but at least it is trending downward. By the way, I did have a chest X-ray last week to see if I had fluid build-up, but none was detected.
I have chemo tomorrow afternoon in Grand Junction. I only have to have Gemzar. We hope to go bowling after chemo if I'm feeling up to it. We may take in a movie afterwards or instead of bowling.
My energy level is better today. Not normal, but better than it's been. I think having three drugs infused last week plus going back on Xeloda did me in this week.
My bowling team has its first game on Friday, February 23rd. We lost our only male member, Mike Wage, who has been replaced by a woman named Beth. I think we are the only all female team in this league. We're truly "The Harem" this time around.
Thanks again to so many people who have sent thoughts, prayers, good wishes, card, e-mails, phone calls, etc. I really appreciate your support.
Just up here in Colorado getting psyched for the next round of bowling.
Sincerely, Caroline
I have chemo tomorrow afternoon in Grand Junction. I only have to have Gemzar. We hope to go bowling after chemo if I'm feeling up to it. We may take in a movie afterwards or instead of bowling.
My energy level is better today. Not normal, but better than it's been. I think having three drugs infused last week plus going back on Xeloda did me in this week.
My bowling team has its first game on Friday, February 23rd. We lost our only male member, Mike Wage, who has been replaced by a woman named Beth. I think we are the only all female team in this league. We're truly "The Harem" this time around.
Thanks again to so many people who have sent thoughts, prayers, good wishes, card, e-mails, phone calls, etc. I really appreciate your support.
Just up here in Colorado getting psyched for the next round of bowling.
Sincerely, Caroline
Wednesday, February 14, 2007
Happy Valentine's Day!
Sorry I haven't posted in a while. I have been feeling rather crummy lately, with the exception of last weekend when I had "steroid energy" from my chemo last Friday. I worked in the store on Saturday and part of Sunday. Robert said I was driving him crazy. "Let's move these books over here. Let's re-do this window. Let's move these books to the front of the store. Let's get this stuff out from behind the counter." And so on. He'd been chopping wood, shoveling the deck, helping a friend move her artwork into the old Sandman space, and he was tired. So I said, okay, just move this one set of books and I'll be happy.
I did my radio show on Sunday and have info on how to "stream" it on your computer. I hope to put that in the "dashboard" of this blog, but I want to test it out first.
Okay, so let me catch things up. We got home from Tucson a week ago yesterday on Feb. 6th. I've still been fighting a cold or sinus infection, plus I have been really tired. A pain started in my left shoulder a week ago today. I would take one dose of Ibuprofen during the day, but my oncologist has warned me not to take too much Ibuprofen. So if I just lay still in bed after the Ibuprofen wore off, I wouldn't feel any pain. I've been taking Oxycodone at bedtime. The pain is getting better.
I had a triple shot of chemo last Friday: Gemzar, Avastin, and the bone hardener, Zometa. I'd also been able to stay on my oral chemo Xeloda pretty consistently while down in Tucson, but since I started back on Gemzar, it seems to intensify the Xeloda's side effects of swollen feet and hands. I started back on the Xeloda today after being off for about three days.
I now have a hernia. Apparently, at a spot along the inner incision from my surgery in late 2005, I've developed an opening or hole. Dr. Bergen says there is a very small chance that my intestines could pop through. Oh joy. I hope this doesn't interfere with my bowling.
Additionally, I'm having pain further down in my right abdomen along the inner incision. Hope there are no more hernias down there. My thighs have been aching as well. I don't know if that's muscle or bone pain. Usually, if the pain is in both limbs or has some "symmetry" to it, then it's from chemo. My left hip continues to hurt, but just slightly. I sure hope the radiation last November took care of all the cancer in my bone. This could really mess up my bowling if I have to have more radiation for cancer in my hip or thigh. I'll know more later this week.
The last few days I've been rather queasy. I need to break out some of the stronger nausea meds. The papaya enzymes aren't cutting it. I had been taking Prilosec daily for nausea which seemed to help. Then I wasn't having any nausea anymore so I quit. Guess I better get back on that again, too.
I told Dr. Bergen about the pain in my shoulder, and he ordered a bone scan which I had Monday in Grand Junction. I haven't heard any results yet from the scan. I see Dr. Bergen again on Friday, plus I see Dr. Oldroyd (radiation oncologist) next Tuesday in Montrose to follow up with the radiation on my hip.
On the positive side, my bloodwork was pretty good last Friday. One liver enzyme was slightly elevated. Albumen a little low. Weight steady - 64.8 kilograms. Hemoglobin at 12.0 which means I'm slightly anemic, but that's to be expected from the chemo. I need to call and get my tumor marker results.
Our "No-Tap" bowling league is supposed to start next week. I hope I'm up to bowling again. Robert and I were going to go bowling on Monday in Grand Junction at this beautiful, new bowling center, but I had fallen into my chemo slump and just didn't have the energy. Maybe we'll try on Friday night.
So anyway, I've been under the weather and dealing with chemo side effects or possibly the cancer spreading to other places. I've been watching TV more than usual and am hooked on House, American Idol, My Name Is Earl, 30 Rock, but the last two nights I watched the Westminster dog show. I would love to have a dog - haven't had one since the 70's - but our cats would go nuts, and we're really not set up for a dog at this point. Biscuit gained some weight while we were out of town. I may have gotten the hernia from picking her up! When we got home that Tuesday night from Tucson, she was at the front door wanting to be held and she's barely let me put her down since. I've also become addicted to Kakuro which is a number crossword kind of like Sudoku. When I have energy or am feeling good, I try to get work done. If I'm lying down waiting for a pain or nausea to pass, I will do Sudoku, Kakuro or watch TV.
It's been snowing the last two days, more than what I think they expected.
I may be doing a short documentary with the local school on cholangiocarcinoma or perhaps on having cancer in general. They have a film class at Ouray School which I think is fantastic, and I'd love to work with them.
I hope this finds everyone well, having a good Valentine's Day. I need to send some special love to my cousins in Florida (Nancy, Nita, Donald, and Pam). Their mother, my lovely Aunt Jean, passed away this morning after battling several illnesses for some time.
Just up here in Colorado feeling like I'm literally coming apart at the seams, taking a million different pills, and telling myself, "Ride it out, Caroline! Embrace those meds!"
Sincerely, Caroline
I did my radio show on Sunday and have info on how to "stream" it on your computer. I hope to put that in the "dashboard" of this blog, but I want to test it out first.
Okay, so let me catch things up. We got home from Tucson a week ago yesterday on Feb. 6th. I've still been fighting a cold or sinus infection, plus I have been really tired. A pain started in my left shoulder a week ago today. I would take one dose of Ibuprofen during the day, but my oncologist has warned me not to take too much Ibuprofen. So if I just lay still in bed after the Ibuprofen wore off, I wouldn't feel any pain. I've been taking Oxycodone at bedtime. The pain is getting better.
I had a triple shot of chemo last Friday: Gemzar, Avastin, and the bone hardener, Zometa. I'd also been able to stay on my oral chemo Xeloda pretty consistently while down in Tucson, but since I started back on Gemzar, it seems to intensify the Xeloda's side effects of swollen feet and hands. I started back on the Xeloda today after being off for about three days.
I now have a hernia. Apparently, at a spot along the inner incision from my surgery in late 2005, I've developed an opening or hole. Dr. Bergen says there is a very small chance that my intestines could pop through. Oh joy. I hope this doesn't interfere with my bowling.
Additionally, I'm having pain further down in my right abdomen along the inner incision. Hope there are no more hernias down there. My thighs have been aching as well. I don't know if that's muscle or bone pain. Usually, if the pain is in both limbs or has some "symmetry" to it, then it's from chemo. My left hip continues to hurt, but just slightly. I sure hope the radiation last November took care of all the cancer in my bone. This could really mess up my bowling if I have to have more radiation for cancer in my hip or thigh. I'll know more later this week.
The last few days I've been rather queasy. I need to break out some of the stronger nausea meds. The papaya enzymes aren't cutting it. I had been taking Prilosec daily for nausea which seemed to help. Then I wasn't having any nausea anymore so I quit. Guess I better get back on that again, too.
I told Dr. Bergen about the pain in my shoulder, and he ordered a bone scan which I had Monday in Grand Junction. I haven't heard any results yet from the scan. I see Dr. Bergen again on Friday, plus I see Dr. Oldroyd (radiation oncologist) next Tuesday in Montrose to follow up with the radiation on my hip.
On the positive side, my bloodwork was pretty good last Friday. One liver enzyme was slightly elevated. Albumen a little low. Weight steady - 64.8 kilograms. Hemoglobin at 12.0 which means I'm slightly anemic, but that's to be expected from the chemo. I need to call and get my tumor marker results.
Our "No-Tap" bowling league is supposed to start next week. I hope I'm up to bowling again. Robert and I were going to go bowling on Monday in Grand Junction at this beautiful, new bowling center, but I had fallen into my chemo slump and just didn't have the energy. Maybe we'll try on Friday night.
So anyway, I've been under the weather and dealing with chemo side effects or possibly the cancer spreading to other places. I've been watching TV more than usual and am hooked on House, American Idol, My Name Is Earl, 30 Rock, but the last two nights I watched the Westminster dog show. I would love to have a dog - haven't had one since the 70's - but our cats would go nuts, and we're really not set up for a dog at this point. Biscuit gained some weight while we were out of town. I may have gotten the hernia from picking her up! When we got home that Tuesday night from Tucson, she was at the front door wanting to be held and she's barely let me put her down since. I've also become addicted to Kakuro which is a number crossword kind of like Sudoku. When I have energy or am feeling good, I try to get work done. If I'm lying down waiting for a pain or nausea to pass, I will do Sudoku, Kakuro or watch TV.
It's been snowing the last two days, more than what I think they expected.
I may be doing a short documentary with the local school on cholangiocarcinoma or perhaps on having cancer in general. They have a film class at Ouray School which I think is fantastic, and I'd love to work with them.
I hope this finds everyone well, having a good Valentine's Day. I need to send some special love to my cousins in Florida (Nancy, Nita, Donald, and Pam). Their mother, my lovely Aunt Jean, passed away this morning after battling several illnesses for some time.
Just up here in Colorado feeling like I'm literally coming apart at the seams, taking a million different pills, and telling myself, "Ride it out, Caroline! Embrace those meds!"
Sincerely, Caroline
Thursday, February 01, 2007
Greetings from Arizona
I had chemo early on January 24th, and we left Grand Junction about noon for Arizona. We drove through Utah - Moab, Monticello, Blanding, Bluff, Monument Valley. We got to my sister's house in Prescott at 9:00 p.m. It was nice to drive through the canyon country.
My bloodwork was about the same as at the previous chemo - slightly anemic and platelets a little low. I had been battling a cold which I seem to have given to several other people. It got much worse once we got to Tucson which is probably from the chemo knocking my resistance down. I felt pretty good on Thursday, probably from the steroids I got at chemo the day before. But Friday, I had the full blown side effects - I was freezing cold and could not get warm. My doctor called in a prescription of antibiotics for me, and I have gradually been getting better. I'm still blowing my nose a lot and going through Kleenex like crazy.
Robert & I were open for business starting last Friday at the Inn Suites in Tucson (room 160) with our new business, ColoradoMinerals.com. The show has been going fairly well for us. My sisters came down from Prescott on Tuesday and brought me back home with them. We were going to drive to the south rim of the Grand Canyon yesterday, but it was snowing, and with me still fighting the cold, we thought it would be better to stay home. Today, they made me stay in bed all day, as I am going back to Tucson tomorrow. I finished an autobiography by Donovan, the singer from the 1960's, which was quite interesting. We plan to stop in Phoenix tomorrow and see the Bodyworks-3 exhibit. I want to see what the liver looks like. I hope I can see the bile ducts as well.
We have closed Robert's shop the Sandman in Ouray. We both had raging colds the week before we left, and we couldn't get everything out of the shop before we left town. So we are indebted to our employees Elwood and Rick for moving the last things out of the space for us.
Our space is being taken over by an artist in Ouray named Susan Snodgrass. We love her work and wish her well with her new studio and gallery.
Just down in Arizona, blowing the old honker and enjoying the company of my sisters, my brother-in-law Al, their dog Mac and their two cats.
Sincerely,
Caroline
My bloodwork was about the same as at the previous chemo - slightly anemic and platelets a little low. I had been battling a cold which I seem to have given to several other people. It got much worse once we got to Tucson which is probably from the chemo knocking my resistance down. I felt pretty good on Thursday, probably from the steroids I got at chemo the day before. But Friday, I had the full blown side effects - I was freezing cold and could not get warm. My doctor called in a prescription of antibiotics for me, and I have gradually been getting better. I'm still blowing my nose a lot and going through Kleenex like crazy.
Robert & I were open for business starting last Friday at the Inn Suites in Tucson (room 160) with our new business, ColoradoMinerals.com. The show has been going fairly well for us. My sisters came down from Prescott on Tuesday and brought me back home with them. We were going to drive to the south rim of the Grand Canyon yesterday, but it was snowing, and with me still fighting the cold, we thought it would be better to stay home. Today, they made me stay in bed all day, as I am going back to Tucson tomorrow. I finished an autobiography by Donovan, the singer from the 1960's, which was quite interesting. We plan to stop in Phoenix tomorrow and see the Bodyworks-3 exhibit. I want to see what the liver looks like. I hope I can see the bile ducts as well.
We have closed Robert's shop the Sandman in Ouray. We both had raging colds the week before we left, and we couldn't get everything out of the shop before we left town. So we are indebted to our employees Elwood and Rick for moving the last things out of the space for us.
Our space is being taken over by an artist in Ouray named Susan Snodgrass. We love her work and wish her well with her new studio and gallery.
Just down in Arizona, blowing the old honker and enjoying the company of my sisters, my brother-in-law Al, their dog Mac and their two cats.
Sincerely,
Caroline
Monday, January 22, 2007
I Kind of Know How New Orleans Feels
New Orleans got hit by Katrina in September 2005, and about a month later, I found out I had a tumor the size of a citrus fruit. We're both recovering, not sure we'll make it, but we want to. New Orleans didn't make the Super Bowl, and my bowling team didn't get first place, but we did take second!
It was very close, but we took three of four games. I think we took total points by only four. My average is up to 98 (handicap 82), and I bowled 100, 115, 111.
New Orleans should be very proud of how far they came in the playoffs. To all my coon-ass friends, you should feel good about yourself.
We will be very busy the next few days, but I should be able to post this weekend from Tucson.
Just up here in Colorado, looking forward to our working vacation.
Sincerely, Caroline
It was very close, but we took three of four games. I think we took total points by only four. My average is up to 98 (handicap 82), and I bowled 100, 115, 111.
New Orleans should be very proud of how far they came in the playoffs. To all my coon-ass friends, you should feel good about yourself.
We will be very busy the next few days, but I should be able to post this weekend from Tucson.
Just up here in Colorado, looking forward to our working vacation.
Sincerely, Caroline
Sunday, January 21, 2007
I Have a Bad Cold But Still Got Chemo
I've had a bad cold this week, but I still had chemo this Friday - Gemzar & Avastin. I have not been able to sleep tonight which I think is the steroids. We are leaving town for the Tucson Gem & Mineral Show on Wednesday and have a ton of things to do by then. Robert is still getting moved out of his gift shop space, plus he has to pack for the show. I still have to get W-2's and quarterly payroll taxes done. With the cold this week, I've been knocked out a bit, but seem to be getting better.
Hemoglobin fell below normal this week but wasn't too bad. Platelets also somewhat low. Weight was 63 kg, same as last time, but I've been eating like a pig. (This is my favorite part about cancer, you get to eat anything you want and not gain weight. I could probably eat a whole friggin' cheesecake and not gain an ounce.) I went back on the Xeloda on Friday night. Liver enzymes were mostly good. The ones out of what were only slightly so. Bilirubin was normal. Haven't gotten CA19-9 tumor marker yet.
Dr. Bergen said that the next time we are in Denver, we should check in with the Anschutz Cancer Center at CU Medical Center to see what other procedures they might recommend that aren't available in Grand Junction. We will probably do that the end of February.
I go back for chemo at 9am next Wednesday. We'll leave Grand Junction and head to Arizona. We hope to make it to Prescott to my sister's house, by Wednesday night. We'll head down through Moab, Monticello, Bluff, Blanding, and Mexican Hat. We should be in Tucson by Thursday and ready to sell minerals on Friday. We don't know our room number yet, but we'll be at the Inn-Suites. (At this show, you set up in your motel room.) I am looking forward to some warmer weather and flatter terrain and not having to worry about slipping on the ice and snow.
Well, the bowling team is tied for second with the OJ's who are supposed to be hot right now. We have a tie-breaker game tomorrow night. Even if we lose, I think we still get a trophy for third place. I think I should get most-improved bowler. I think my handicap has dropped almost 10 points, I've never missed a game, and I had chemo and radiation during this league. So I think 3rd place is pretty darn good.
I hope to do my radio show at 1pm tomorrow as well on KURA, 98.9. I think the show is "streamed" on the internet, but I have no idea how you pick it up. They just got a new turntable so I can play vinyl tomorrow if I want. Far out, man!
Okay, I'm going to try to go to bed now. We got a little snow tonight, but only an inch or so.
My deepest sympathy is sent to the Clements family in Utah. Mark Clements, my fellow cholangiocarcinoma patient, passed away last Friday. He was 40 years old and leaves behind a beautiful wife and four wonderful children, not to mention many friends and family who loved him dearly. His sister, Stacie, has been instrumental in setting up the cholangiocarcinoma website for which I am eternally grateful.
I'm sending my love to my Aunt Jean in Florida who is struggling with several health issues at this time, and to her children Donald and Nancy.
Also, I want to send a shout out to my relatives from Kansas City and in southeastern Nebraska. I'm sorry I haven't written but I really appreciate all your cards, letters, and e-mails.
And thanks to all of you who are praying for me. I think God has heard. I'm still here. I don't know for how much longer, but I told God he has to let me live long enough to finish cleaning up and organizing my house. And for those of you who have seen my house, you know that might take a while. I'm slowly, but surely making some progress. I'm kind of like Earl (from the TV show "My Name is Earl") - I have a list of things. I'm not leaving till I get 'em all done.
Just up here in Colorado, hoping to get some sleep so I can do good at bowling tomorrow night.
Sincerely, Caroline
Hemoglobin fell below normal this week but wasn't too bad. Platelets also somewhat low. Weight was 63 kg, same as last time, but I've been eating like a pig. (This is my favorite part about cancer, you get to eat anything you want and not gain weight. I could probably eat a whole friggin' cheesecake and not gain an ounce.) I went back on the Xeloda on Friday night. Liver enzymes were mostly good. The ones out of what were only slightly so. Bilirubin was normal. Haven't gotten CA19-9 tumor marker yet.
Dr. Bergen said that the next time we are in Denver, we should check in with the Anschutz Cancer Center at CU Medical Center to see what other procedures they might recommend that aren't available in Grand Junction. We will probably do that the end of February.
I go back for chemo at 9am next Wednesday. We'll leave Grand Junction and head to Arizona. We hope to make it to Prescott to my sister's house, by Wednesday night. We'll head down through Moab, Monticello, Bluff, Blanding, and Mexican Hat. We should be in Tucson by Thursday and ready to sell minerals on Friday. We don't know our room number yet, but we'll be at the Inn-Suites. (At this show, you set up in your motel room.) I am looking forward to some warmer weather and flatter terrain and not having to worry about slipping on the ice and snow.
Well, the bowling team is tied for second with the OJ's who are supposed to be hot right now. We have a tie-breaker game tomorrow night. Even if we lose, I think we still get a trophy for third place. I think I should get most-improved bowler. I think my handicap has dropped almost 10 points, I've never missed a game, and I had chemo and radiation during this league. So I think 3rd place is pretty darn good.
I hope to do my radio show at 1pm tomorrow as well on KURA, 98.9. I think the show is "streamed" on the internet, but I have no idea how you pick it up. They just got a new turntable so I can play vinyl tomorrow if I want. Far out, man!
Okay, I'm going to try to go to bed now. We got a little snow tonight, but only an inch or so.
My deepest sympathy is sent to the Clements family in Utah. Mark Clements, my fellow cholangiocarcinoma patient, passed away last Friday. He was 40 years old and leaves behind a beautiful wife and four wonderful children, not to mention many friends and family who loved him dearly. His sister, Stacie, has been instrumental in setting up the cholangiocarcinoma website for which I am eternally grateful.
I'm sending my love to my Aunt Jean in Florida who is struggling with several health issues at this time, and to her children Donald and Nancy.
Also, I want to send a shout out to my relatives from Kansas City and in southeastern Nebraska. I'm sorry I haven't written but I really appreciate all your cards, letters, and e-mails.
And thanks to all of you who are praying for me. I think God has heard. I'm still here. I don't know for how much longer, but I told God he has to let me live long enough to finish cleaning up and organizing my house. And for those of you who have seen my house, you know that might take a while. I'm slowly, but surely making some progress. I'm kind of like Earl (from the TV show "My Name is Earl") - I have a list of things. I'm not leaving till I get 'em all done.
Just up here in Colorado, hoping to get some sleep so I can do good at bowling tomorrow night.
Sincerely, Caroline
Tuesday, January 16, 2007
Second Place
We started out bowling really well last night and took the first two games, but Hawaiian Heat came on strong in the third game and beat us in total points as well. So we took two of four games. We are now in second place. If the OJ's (Lynn Olin and the Jennings brothers) take all four of their games this week, we will be tied for second and have to have a bowl-off with them for 2nd. They're supposed to be really tough right now.
My scratch scores were 109, 88, and 112. Mike Wage, our best bowler, had a scratch score of 204 in the first game.
Well, it looks like we'll "medal" (end up in the top three). The no-tap league starts mid-February and our team plans to bowl then, too.
I have a cold today, so I am laying low and getting some bookkeeping done. My husband Robert is in City Council meeting all day and tonight as well. He had to get up at 5:30 am this morning as the City Council cooks breakfast for the employees once a year and today was that day.
I watched part of the Golden Globes last night, and I was glad to see Hugh Laurie win for "House". We recently watched The Chorus (La Chorista) and Men with Brooms on DVD and they were both good. Men with Brooms is a comedy about the sport of curling.
Back to work!
Just up here in Colorado, understanding what Michelle Kwan felt like when she got the silver at the Olympics. I still feel good about myself!
Sincerely, Caroline
My scratch scores were 109, 88, and 112. Mike Wage, our best bowler, had a scratch score of 204 in the first game.
Well, it looks like we'll "medal" (end up in the top three). The no-tap league starts mid-February and our team plans to bowl then, too.
I have a cold today, so I am laying low and getting some bookkeeping done. My husband Robert is in City Council meeting all day and tonight as well. He had to get up at 5:30 am this morning as the City Council cooks breakfast for the employees once a year and today was that day.
I watched part of the Golden Globes last night, and I was glad to see Hugh Laurie win for "House". We recently watched The Chorus (La Chorista) and Men with Brooms on DVD and they were both good. Men with Brooms is a comedy about the sport of curling.
Back to work!
Just up here in Colorado, understanding what Michelle Kwan felt like when she got the silver at the Olympics. I still feel good about myself!
Sincerely, Caroline
Sunday, January 14, 2007
Greetings from Gravyland
I really didn't expect to still be on this earth by now, so I consider my life to be "gravy" at this point. I am sopping it up with a biscuit and enjoying every bite! There's a song by the folk-singer John Gorka called Gravyland which he says is "the kind of song you write when your real life exceeds your dreams". It's on his Temporary Road CD which I think is his best. It also has the song Looking Forward which is the first song I ever heard by him. I was working on an audit in Abilene, Texas in 1993, and they played it on the NPR station. Robert & I got to see John Gorka and Lucy Kaplansky in concert together at a winery in Grand Junction a few years ago. It was a real treat for us.
CT-SCAN UPDATE
I had a CT-scan last week. Two of the larger tumors in my liver have grown by 1 to 2 cm which is the bad news, but the good news is that they didn't see any new tumors anywhere else such as in my lungs or abdominal wall. We're going to stick with the current chemo regimen despite the growth. We think that my being off chemo while I was on radiation in November is what allowed the tumors to grow.
I had a Gemzar and Zometa (bone hardener) infusion this week. I'm tired this weekend from the chemo. I would normally be at the radio station doing my show right now, but I am just too tired. My tumor marker was back up over 3300. My hemoglobin was 13.5 which is in the normal range which is the first time it's been that high in months - the Aranesp shot did the trick. Platelets still a little on the low side. Weight was 63 kilograms. I had three breadsticks with my pasta at Olive Garden that day.
BOWLING NEWS
We took three of four games against the MAKK Daddies last Monday night. (The MAKK Daddies are: Junior Mattivi, County Sheriff; Chris Alvarez; Shane Kavanaugh, Ouray Policeman; and Adam Kunz, Ouray Fire Chief. Junior and Shane had new bowling balls which I coveted, although they had some trouble adjusting to them which may have helped us to win.) I bowled a 138, 94, and 98. That first game was 42 points above my average (96) - we took that game by 64 points. I had the same scratch score in the first game as Mike Wage, our best bowler.
We were tied with the Mixed Nuts who took all four games last week against the Hawaiin Heat. We bowl HH tomorrow night, and the Mixed Nuts have a bye. We have to win all four games to stay in first place. WISH US LUCK!
The Ice-Climbing Festival is going on in Ouray this weekend, and we have people from all over the world in town. We've had a bit more snow, so we definitely have a cold, but beautiful winter happening outside.
Okay, I think that's it for now. I feel a nap coming on. I took a long nap yesterday afternoon and was awakened by fireworks at 5:30pm. Apparently, the Fire Department blasted off the ones that wouldn't go off on New Year's Eve. I'm sure it was part of the festivities at the Ice Park, so it was a nice touch.
Just up here in Colorado enjoying biscuits and gravy.
Sincerely, Caroline
CT-SCAN UPDATE
I had a CT-scan last week. Two of the larger tumors in my liver have grown by 1 to 2 cm which is the bad news, but the good news is that they didn't see any new tumors anywhere else such as in my lungs or abdominal wall. We're going to stick with the current chemo regimen despite the growth. We think that my being off chemo while I was on radiation in November is what allowed the tumors to grow.
I had a Gemzar and Zometa (bone hardener) infusion this week. I'm tired this weekend from the chemo. I would normally be at the radio station doing my show right now, but I am just too tired. My tumor marker was back up over 3300. My hemoglobin was 13.5 which is in the normal range which is the first time it's been that high in months - the Aranesp shot did the trick. Platelets still a little on the low side. Weight was 63 kilograms. I had three breadsticks with my pasta at Olive Garden that day.
BOWLING NEWS
We took three of four games against the MAKK Daddies last Monday night. (The MAKK Daddies are: Junior Mattivi, County Sheriff; Chris Alvarez; Shane Kavanaugh, Ouray Policeman; and Adam Kunz, Ouray Fire Chief. Junior and Shane had new bowling balls which I coveted, although they had some trouble adjusting to them which may have helped us to win.) I bowled a 138, 94, and 98. That first game was 42 points above my average (96) - we took that game by 64 points. I had the same scratch score in the first game as Mike Wage, our best bowler.
We were tied with the Mixed Nuts who took all four games last week against the Hawaiin Heat. We bowl HH tomorrow night, and the Mixed Nuts have a bye. We have to win all four games to stay in first place. WISH US LUCK!
The Ice-Climbing Festival is going on in Ouray this weekend, and we have people from all over the world in town. We've had a bit more snow, so we definitely have a cold, but beautiful winter happening outside.
Okay, I think that's it for now. I feel a nap coming on. I took a long nap yesterday afternoon and was awakened by fireworks at 5:30pm. Apparently, the Fire Department blasted off the ones that wouldn't go off on New Year's Eve. I'm sure it was part of the festivities at the Ice Park, so it was a nice touch.
Just up here in Colorado enjoying biscuits and gravy.
Sincerely, Caroline
Monday, January 08, 2007
Tied for First; Feeling Better
After last week's round of bowling, my team is tied for first again (with the team Mixed Nuts). Yippee! We have two games left - tonight and next Monday. Wish us luck. Like I said before, I want to get my picture on the wall of the Elks' Bowling Alley on a legitimate basis. It'll be part of my legacy in Ouray. Only the first place team is pictured. It'd be awesome to win for a regular league and not just No-Tap (which starts mid-February and I hope our team will do that league).
I hit the chemo slump on Saturday, but I'm feeling better today. I just got really tired, and Robert & I were going to the mineral showroom to finish some 2006 bookkeeping, but I sat down on the bed which ended up being a long nap with Biscuit (aka Jabba the cat) on my chest. She's like a paperweight holding me down. It didn't take too much persuasion to lie down and stay put for a while. We did get to the mineral showroom yesterday and got most of our work done. I'm going to try to add a link to this blog for our website for ColoradoMinerals.com.
My left hip does hurt some, but it may be the Aranesp shot stimulating the bone marrow. My right hip hurt this weekend, too, but it went away. That makes me think it's the Aranesp. I also just found out that my CA19-9 is back up to 3295, dang it. I need to get back on my Xeloda tonight after I bowl. I stopped Saturday night because the hands and feet were swelling up. On a positive note, my hair seems to be getting thicker and not so fuzzy.
My good days are starting to be better, and the bad days aren't so bad. The Prilosec seems to help with the queasiness although I do still get it, just not as much. I think the radiation in November added to my fatigue recently. Maybe that's wearing off - hope so. My weight keeps trying slip down on me despite adding bacon, butter, and cake & ice cream to my diet. Fortunately, my appetite is good. I think there's some fudge out there with my name on it that I'll track down today. After being on and off Weight Watchers most of my adult life, this is a real change. I think we'll go to Olive Garden for lunch on Wednesday after my scan and chemo, and I'll eat all the breadsticks I want!
We had more snow last week, so it is a white, winter-wonderland outside.
I want to thank everyone again for all your prayers, positive thoughts, cards, gifts, flowers, and warm words. It keeps me going, and I think the prayers are working. As I've said before, I didn't think I'd be alive at this time, and it's just great to be here!
I have to scoot. Gotta get some work done while I have some energy.
Just up here in Colorado enjoying a sunny, bright white day and hoping to bowl well tonight. You can imagine what fun it is to say to some of those crusty Elk dudes, "Hey, I'm a woman, I have cancer, and I'm bowling better than you!"
Sincerely, Caroline
I hit the chemo slump on Saturday, but I'm feeling better today. I just got really tired, and Robert & I were going to the mineral showroom to finish some 2006 bookkeeping, but I sat down on the bed which ended up being a long nap with Biscuit (aka Jabba the cat) on my chest. She's like a paperweight holding me down. It didn't take too much persuasion to lie down and stay put for a while. We did get to the mineral showroom yesterday and got most of our work done. I'm going to try to add a link to this blog for our website for ColoradoMinerals.com.
My left hip does hurt some, but it may be the Aranesp shot stimulating the bone marrow. My right hip hurt this weekend, too, but it went away. That makes me think it's the Aranesp. I also just found out that my CA19-9 is back up to 3295, dang it. I need to get back on my Xeloda tonight after I bowl. I stopped Saturday night because the hands and feet were swelling up. On a positive note, my hair seems to be getting thicker and not so fuzzy.
My good days are starting to be better, and the bad days aren't so bad. The Prilosec seems to help with the queasiness although I do still get it, just not as much. I think the radiation in November added to my fatigue recently. Maybe that's wearing off - hope so. My weight keeps trying slip down on me despite adding bacon, butter, and cake & ice cream to my diet. Fortunately, my appetite is good. I think there's some fudge out there with my name on it that I'll track down today. After being on and off Weight Watchers most of my adult life, this is a real change. I think we'll go to Olive Garden for lunch on Wednesday after my scan and chemo, and I'll eat all the breadsticks I want!
We had more snow last week, so it is a white, winter-wonderland outside.
I want to thank everyone again for all your prayers, positive thoughts, cards, gifts, flowers, and warm words. It keeps me going, and I think the prayers are working. As I've said before, I didn't think I'd be alive at this time, and it's just great to be here!
I have to scoot. Gotta get some work done while I have some energy.
Just up here in Colorado enjoying a sunny, bright white day and hoping to bowl well tonight. You can imagine what fun it is to say to some of those crusty Elk dudes, "Hey, I'm a woman, I have cancer, and I'm bowling better than you!"
Sincerely, Caroline
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)